


Somebody Else

by i_ship_too_many_things



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, M/M, Marauders' Era, Mutual Pining, Slow Burn
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-07-08
Updated: 2017-12-01
Packaged: 2018-11-29 10:19:58
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 21
Words: 23,881
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11438826
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/i_ship_too_many_things/pseuds/i_ship_too_many_things
Summary: Remus has the most massive crush on Sirius to ever exist in the history of crushes and its crushing. Sirius doesn't know who he is and what he wants until he does and then its too late...





	1. Sirius is Straight, Shut Up

Remus and Sirius had always been close. It drove Remus insane. Every casual touch from Sirius was maddening because it wasn’t enough. It wasn’t everything it could be. 

But it couldn’t be. Remus chastised himself again for expecting everything. Sirius was straight. He had to get that into his thick skull. No chance of anything happening between them. No matter how many light feather-like touches they shared in passing moments. No matter how many times Remus felt the familiar jolt when Sirius’ skin brushed against his. Because Sirius didn’t feel it too and he couldn’t. 

How would Sirius react if he knew how Remus thought of him? Remus seriously doubted that Sirius would be comfortable sleeping in a bed mere feet from a man who sometimes dreamt that they would one day share a bed together. Remus told him self this was why he had not told his friends he was gay. What a wonderful excuse for fear.

Remus pulled himself out of his thoughts and rested his head on his hand. He turned in his bed, glancing at the clock that glowed on his nightstand. 12:34. Remus sighed heavily wishing there was somewhere he could go in his boarding school in the middle of the night when he couldn’t sleep. But he seemed like St Vince’s was not built for insomniacs. 

Remus occupied his sleepless time glancing around his dormitory room. To his right were two occupied beds. Only a wild mop of black hair stuck out over the top of the blankets on the bed directly next to Remus. The tufts of hair were the only sign that the bed was occupied by James Potter, his round metal glasses resting on his nightstand. Beyond James, Remus could just make out a sandy haired boy turning fitfully in his sleep, his blankets twining themselves around his body so that he would have to disentangle himself from them in the morning. 

On Remus’ left was the last bed. It too was occupied. Sirius Black’s hair lay spread on his pillow, longer than any of the other boys’ (although nowhere near as long as he wanted it to be). His face was slightly obscured by strands of his jet-black hair but Remus could still make out his features and smiled. Sirius’ curtain was half drawn so that it shielded only the lower half of his body- none of the boys bothered to close their curtains fully. Remus couldn’t help but wonder if that would still be the case if his friends knew he was gay. Shut up Remus he whispered to himself as he settled back onto his bed, lying flat on his back and staring up at the ceiling. 

Eventually Remus’ eyes began to fall closed and he drifted into deep sleep.

***********

Remus watched as Sirius tapped his pencil against the desk impatiently. No doubt he was willing time to speed up so he could escape his history lesson as soon as possible. And yet the clock hands still turned at a painfully slow pace and their history teacher, Professor Binns, was still droning on about something that neither Sirius nor Remus cared about. 

Eventually the torturously slow lesson came to a halt, when the loud school bell rang out. Professor Binns stopped midway through scratching a sentence on the chalkboard and paused on the spot as the students behind him began to pack their bags hastily, each one as eager to leave as each other. 

Remus hurried out of the classroom, following Sirius, James and Peter as they walked out to the green behind the main school building. 

Sirius flung the doors open and began to run out onto the grass. Soon enough James had taken off as well and ran to catch up with Sirius. Remus and Peter walked slowly across the grass, Remus’ eyes following Sirius as he ran. Sirius’ hair was blown out behind him, tangling in the wind as he ran. Once James and Sirius had reached the boundary Remus saw Sirius turn back to watch them walk slowly towards him. It took Remus a few seconds to register that Sirius had then started to run back towards him.

Sirius reached Remus and Peter quickly and knelt before Remus with his face turned away from him, “Hop on.” Sirius urged Remus. 

Remus stood stock still for a moment, his mind running over his options before giving in to what he wanted. He climbed carefully onto Sirius’ back. Sirius’ hands reached around and held Remus’ things close to his body and Remus almost sighed at the contact he felt between them. Remus’ hands looped over Sirius’ shoulders and connected around his neck. As Sirius pushed himself back to his feet Remus, wobbled and fell forward so that his chest was now pressed against Sirius’ back. Sirius then took off running again, Remus laughing and bouncing, on his back and Peter stumbling as he ran to keep up with them, not keen on the idea of being left behind to walk alone. 

Sirius and Remus reached James before long and Sirius fell carefully to the grass so that the pair lay on the glass beside each other. Remus felt his leg trapped under Sirius’ fallen body and could swear that Sirius’ head was lent back against his chest. Peter stumbled up towards them, now managing to reach them successfully. Sirius lay panting on the ground for a while, Remus still laughing next to him, with James and Peter stood over them. 

“Come on you ass twat.” James stuck out his hand for Sirius for Sirius to take and helped him stand back up. “We haven’t got long before our double date come on.” Remus’ face fell at those words but he tried to conceal it from his friends. He had forgotten about that, about her. Stupid Remus, getting caught up everything again, deluding yourself, Remus thought to himself. 

The next hour seemed to go by so quickly in a blur of cigarette smoke, sarcastic comments and light touches from Sirius that drove Remus wild. He had to constantly remind himself that his thoughts could never happen and he was more likely to get hit by a bolt of lightning than go out with Sirius Black.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *dramatic voiceover voice*   
> NEXT TIME ON SOMEBODY ELSE:
> 
> 'Once his mind was no longer worried about concealing his boner only one question appeared in Sirius’ mind.
> 
> AM I GAY?'


	2. Fate is Fake, Fireworks are a Fantasy

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just so you know I'm gonna be attempting to get these out on a weekly basis on a Saturday morning normally. Also the chapters alternate perspectives between Remus and Sirius- odd numbered chapters are Remus and even are Sirius.
> 
> Hope you enjoy  
> ~ i_ship_too_many_things <3

“Sirius,” James beckoned for Sirius to follow him and the two of them left a confused Lily chatting to Sirius’ date, Ellie. 

“Get your act together man.” James hit Sirius’ arm with no real power behind his punch as soon as they were out of earshot of the girls. 

“What do you mean?” Sirius asked rubbing his arm where James had hit him even though it did not hurt. 

“You’re barely talking to Ellie!” James hissed under his breath so he could be sure that the girls could not hear his words. “I agreed that we’d make this a double date because I didn’t want you to feel awkward but this is ridiculous now you might as well be on a date with me the way you're acting.”

“I’m just not interested her I guess.” Sirius pushed his hair out of his eyes, as he spoke he didn’t know why but he knew that what he was saying was true. He should be interested in Ellie. He knew that. Every other guy in the whole school was. But Sirius wasn’t and he had no idea why. 

“Not interested in her?” James spluttered, repeating Sirius’ words back to him as if checking to see if he had misheard. “Everyone is interested in Ellie Price. Anyone would think you were gay or something if you said that.” 

Sirius opened his mouth as if he was going so say something but he didn’t know quite what he was intending on saying. 

“Now get your act together.” James insisted firmly. “I worked my ass off to get you this date and you are going to make the most of it. You haven’t been out on a date in ages and I feel like you need to see some action but none of that is going to happen if you don’t put in the effort.”

“Okay okay.” Sirius agreed. He might not be interested in Ellie but it couldn’t hurt to make out with her a little bit. What could go wrong?

The film moved slowly. It was a romance-y film that Sirius would never have chosen to watch had he been given the choice, but Lily and Ellie seemed to be enjoying it. Sirius could tell the enjoyment on James’ face was feigned even if Lily couldn’t. They’d barely been going out a month now and they were still in the early stage of a relationship of attempting to please the other. That meant that James went a little bit crazy planning every single date meticulously making sure Lily would enjoy it and that the flowers he had gotten her were just right. Sirius almost felt sorry for him but he seemed happy. 

That soppy relationship stuff wasn’t for Sirius. What James and Lily had seemed restrictive and almost painful. Why would Sirius want a girl around constantly telling him where they should go and what he needed to buy for her? Sirius almost shuddered at the thought. He much rather spend time with his best friends.

Sirius was quickly jerked from his thoughts as he felt Ellie lean her head against his shoulder. Sirius froze instinctively not knowing what he should be doing in response. Sirius settled for just allowing Ellie to lean against him. That was a good thing to be doing. Right? It wasn’t until Ellie was sitting entirely in her own seat, her body not touching Sirius’ at all was Sirius able to focus on the film again and see where they were at. Sirius felt his heart almost stop as he saw what was on the screen. 

Two men, both very sexy, Sirius thought, with thick muscles and prominent jaw lines, were naked in bed. One was on top of the other, his mouth nipping at the skin on the nape of the neck of the man lying beneath him. Sirius couldn’t take his eyes off of the screen as the man on top began to kiss his way down the other’s bare chest until his head disappeared beneath the sheets.

Sirius couldn’t help but imagine exactly what was going on beneath those sheets as the sound of the deep grunts coming from the speakers began to fill the cinema. And that was Sirius noticed that he had a very prominent boner. 

Sirius almost gasped but bit his lip instead. He did not need to alert either Ellie or James to the fact the men on the screen had given Sirius a raging hard on. Sirius managed to conceal the boner with his hands placed strategically in his lap but it did not subside until long after the film had moved onto a completely different and non-sexual occurrence. 

Once his mind was no longer worried about concealing his boner only one question appeared in Sirius’ mind.

_AM I GAY?_

Sirius shook his head sternly, earning himself an odd look from Ellie, which he ignored. He had more important matters to deal with than he date thinking he was slightly insane.

_I'm not gay._

Sirius spoke in his head to himself. But then how do you explain his reaction to those men? That hadn’t happened to James had it? So he must be gay. Sirius shook his head again. 

_No. I'm not gay._

Sirius had never thought of a guy that way in his life. 

_See! I'm not gay! ___

____

____

Sirius seemed to be arguing with himself, his heart and his brain telling him different things.

Now that Sirius thought about it he’d never thought about girls that way before either. He glanced at Ellie out of the corner of his eye.

_That doesn’t mean I'm gay! That doesn’t prove anything!_

It didn’t exactly disprove anything either. 

Sirius had to stop thinking then as the film drew to a close, with Sirius having completely missed three-quarters of it. Sirius stood, not quite sure where he was going, it was like his little debate with himself had completely thrown him off of his game and he had no clue how any part of his body functioned anymore. It took James nudging him in the direction he had to head for his legs to figure out how to move and he seemed to be walking on autopilot out of the row, down the stairs and out of the cinema following Ellie. She seemed to be swinging her hips as she walked, her butt sticking out a little further than seemed normal, no doubt this was supposed to entice Sirius but as he noticed it moving he shifted his eyes so that he was staring at her shoulders. 

The group began to head back towards their school, James and Lily walking ahead of Sirius and Ellie. As they re-entered the school grounds, Ellie grabbed Sirius’ hand and stepped closer to him so she could whisper to him as he walked. 

“I know how to get in to Flitwick’s classroom.” Ellie spoke, her voice low and quiet, intended to have a sultry tone that Sirius did not really care for. 

Sirius turned to her and grinned, “Lead the way.” He too spoke low and quietly, causing Ellie to giggle as she began to lead him by the hand to Flitwick’s empty classroom saying hurried goodbyes to James and Lily as they past them. He seemed to be doing well all of a sudden. 

_See, not gay._

Ellie’s hand was very small in Sirius’ own. Her fingers were slender and Sirius thought that they would slip through the gaps between his own fingers. 

Ellie managed to unlock Flitwick’s room with a hairpin without letting go of Sirius’ hand and pulled him into the classroom. She dragged him across to the nearest desk and she sat back onto it, guiding Sirius to stand between her legs. 

Sirius didn’t know where he was meant to put his hands. His natural stance wouldn’t work, his hands would be resting on her legs and that seemed inappropriate. He couldn’t keep them to himself however because Ellie was far from doing the same. Her hands had begun to move, she slid them up over his arms and to his shoulders pulling him closer to her and he stumbled clumsily. As Ellie began to run her hands down over Sirius’ chest she spoke softly, “kiss me.”

Sirius leant down awkwardly towards her, his movement slow and calculated, unsure of how his lips would reach hers comfortably. It seemed that Ellie had gotten impatient as she grabbed Sirius by the neck and yanked his head down so that his lips found hers. Her kiss was rough and Sirius could feel Ellie’s tongue brushing over his lips within seconds. 

Sirius felt nothing. Of course there were the physical sensations of Ellie’s tongue pushing against his lips attempting to part them and her hands now pulling at the collar of his shirt to hold him in place. But there was no feeling inside of Sirius that told him that any of this was special or worth anything at all. There were no fireworks to speak of. 

But maybe the fireworks were a myth invented by rom-com authors looking for a corny line. That must be it. This is what a kiss feels like. Sirius told himself. Get over it. Stop expecting something incredible to happen. Sirius opened his mouth and allowed Ellie’s tongue to enter.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *dramatic voiceover voice*  
> NEXT TIME ON SOMEBODY ELSE:
> 
> '“Have you have thought about a guy… sexually?”'


	3. Coming Out is Cool

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As you may have noticed I've now put up that this fic will be 21 chapters long but I'm not entirely sure yet as I haven't written that far ahead. I'm currently writing chapter 18 and I could easily squish it down to 20 or maybe extend it to 22 just so I have an even number because I'm a perfectionist like that. 
> 
> Anyway, I hope you enjoy this chapter and all of the chapters to come, however many there may be. 
> 
> ~ i_ship_too_many_things <3

Truth or dare was always one of Remus’ favourite things to do with the boys, even though there was a prominent element of danger to it. Not because of the dares- he was more than happy to run down into the common room and shout something rude or booby trap someone else’s dorm room- that wasn’t the issue. The danger came from the truths. On some days that was a danger he enjoyed and on others it was one he shied away from, only picking truth when their self-made house rules dictated he had to.

But today, with Sirius by his side and James with a mysterious twinkle in his eye, that could only mean that things were going well with Lily, he was feeling daring. He was willing to tempt fate. “Truth.” He settled back on his elbows, sprawled on the floor of the boys dormitory, ready for whatever his friends could throw at him. 

“Alright…” James sat forwards, rubbing his hands together, his eyebrows twitching as he thought of no doubt a deviously well worded truth that could only be answered exactly the way he wanted it to be. “Are you…” He began, his question formulating as he spoke, “Are you interested in anyone at this school?”

Remus smiled slightly, deliberately not looking at Sirius for fear of giving it away, not that he would- straight people are always oblivious to gayness I’ve if it is staring them right in the face. “Sexually?” Remus asked smirking as he did so. His confidence was quite alien to himself and he was surprised by it. 

“Yes.” James nodded. 

“Yes.” Remus answered tentatively his eyes locked on James’ so that he was not tempted to look at Sirius as he spoke. 

“Alright then.” James smirked sitting back, leaning his back against his four-poster bed.

“James,” Sirius spoke up next sitting forward so that his chin rested on his knees. Remus dared to look at him and luckily did not feel the all too familiar flush of red creep up his face. 

Sirius spoke like he had known what he had wanted to say for a long time now. “Have you have thought about a guy… sexually?” Sirius added the last word with a quiver in his voice that only Remus heard. 

Remus turned to stare at Sirius as the boy sat, awaiting the answer with what looked a lot like apprehension and almost hope.

_Why did Sirius want to know if James had had any thoughts about guys? Sirius wasn’t gay was he?_

Remus wrenched himself away from his thoughts in time to here James’ response. “Of course not.” James looked confused as to why that was even a question that Sirius had even considered asking. “I'm not gay! Do I look gay?” James looked around the circle of boys his eyes wide.

“No you don’t look gay James.” Remus replied quickly, eager to move the subject on.

“Right Remus.” Peter stepped in now, continuing the game brushing the last question aside. “So who is she?”

“Who’s who?” Remus looked back towards Peter. 

“Your crush!” James chipped in, his face telling Remus he thought that this was the most obvious connection in the world.

_Oh god._

“It’s not even my turn.” Remus’ voice shook, all of his confidence from earlier gone in a split second. 

“So?” James sat forward, resting his chin on his hands. “You’ve been asked a question you are now under the sacred oath of the truth or dare circle. The question must be answered.”

“I don’t want…” Remus’ voice tailed off as he spoke.

“It’s someone unavailable then!” Peter pointed accusingly at Remus. “I bet it’s Lily.”

“It’s not Lily.” Remus spoke hastily as James’ face furrowed.

“I reckon it’s Alice then.” James sat back, speculating as Remus curled his legs up to his body. This had gone way further than Remus had ever intended.

“Oo yeah maybe,” Peter agreed with James, “or that Lovegood girl.”

Remus had had enough of Peter and James reeling off almost every single girl in the whole year and something in side him snapped. “Who says it’s a girl?” Remus blurted out.

“What.” Peter looked over at Remus his eyes wide, “It’s not a girl?”

“No. It’s not. ” Remus could feel a blush rushing up over his face suddenly all of his fears came rushing back to him. 

_Shit. Well done Remus they’re all going to hate you now. You’re going to be alone now. Everything’s going to change and…_

“Fair enough.” James settled forward on his hands, “Who is he?” Peter looked like he was going to say something but thought better of it at James’ words.

Remus’ took a moment to compute what James was saying. “What?”

“Who is he?” James repeated, smiling warmly.

“You don’t care?” Remus was incredulous. It was all okay? They didn’t care? 

“No of course not.” James batted the air carelessly. “Why should that matter?”

Remus breathed a sigh of relief and he didn’t care if it was cliché to feel this way but he couldn’t help but feel like there was a weight lifted off of his shoulders. He didn’t have to hide from his friends anymore. 

“No but seriously tell us who he is.” James poked Remus across the circle. 

“If he doesn’t want to tell you who it is he shouldn’t have to.” Sirius piped up, pushing his hair out of his eyes and moving so he sat cross-legged on the floor. 

“Thanks Pads.” Remus smiled, luckily his blush was already prominent on his face so no one could tell when he blushed deeper. 

They couldn’t know that it was Sirius. Sirius couldn’t know. He wouldn’t be comfortable Remus was sure of it so he had to keep it to himself no matter what. 

“Okay but we’ll get it out of you at some point Moony.” James raised his eyebrows.

Remus rolled his eyes and the game continued as it always did. He sighed with relief as they decided not to press Remus for more details that he couldn’t divulge.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *dramatic voiceover voice*  
> NEXT TIME ON SOMEBODY ELSE:
> 
> 'Suddenly everything was heightened and Sirius was kissing back with more enthusiasm'


	4. Nowhere Near Normal

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, just so's you know I have finished writing this fanfic so it's all ready to go out to you guys! Which is super exciting. I hope you guys are as excited as me! I'm gonna start working on my next HP fic which I shall not be reveal but it is not Wolfstar.
> 
> Ooo drama
> 
> As always, hope y'all enjoy the chapter!
> 
> ~ i_ship_too_many_things <3

Sirius sighed against Ellie’s lips- not from arousal but from boredom. They had been kissing in the corner of the common room for far to long by now and he was bored. Ellie was sat on his lap and her eyes were firmly closed, allowing his to be open and looking over her shoulder at his friends as they were relaxing together and chatting as they always did and he wasn’t a part of it because he was here, in this corner, with a woman sat on his lap and he was bored out of his brain. But there was nothing he could do about that, this was how it worked in a relationship- you had to give some things up- like your friends and your happiness. 

As he looked at Remus over Ellie’s shoulder his mind began to drift. Remus was gay. Or at least he liked guys. Sirius hadn’t stop thinking about it since the game of truth or dare the night before. He may have struggled with sleep trying to rack his brains to figure out who it was. He didn’t know why he was so obsessed with it but he couldn’t get it out of his head. And then as he thought more about it and felt the press of Ellie’s lips against his suddenly he imagined it was Remus he was kissing, that it was Remus sat straddling him and it has his rough hand on his neck and tugging his hair and Sirius groaned, starting to kiss harder at the thought. Suddenly everything was heightened and Sirius was kissing back with more enthusiasm as he felt Remus’ touch on his body and the weight of him hovering over Sirius’ legs.

“Someone’s excited.” Ellie laughed and suddenly Sirius was broken out of his trance. It was not Remus that he was kissing. It was his girlfriend. 

“Oh,” He pulled away from her, leaning back, putting his hands on her shoulder when she tried to follow him backwards. “No I need to go.” His mind was reeling. What had he just done?

“If you’re getting too turned on I can help you out.” She ran her hands down his chest.

“No, no thank you.” He pushed her backwards and she slid off his lap. He stood up and walked away.

“Babe?” Sirius ignored her and walked towards the bathrooms before he was stopped by a familiar hand around his wrist- one that he had just been imagining on his neck and fisted in his shirt.

“What’s up with you?” Remus frowned, “Are you okay?”

Sirius panicked and took a step away, his hand falling out of Remus’ loose grip, “Yeah I’m fine, I just need to go to the toilet.” 

Remus nodded and Sirius practically sprinted for the bathroom. He made for the stall furthest from the door and locked himself in, throwing his head back on the wall and letting out a shaking breath. Dear God this was bad. This was so bad. He had just been out there kissing his girlfriend and imagining it was one of his best friends and that made it feel better. That made him want it- made him enjoy it. 

_Maybe I am gay?_

He swallowed hard again. Surely, that’s what it meant that he had enjoyed that image more than the reality of his very hot girlfriend. He pushed his hair back out of his face and tied it up. He took a deep breath and left the bathroom stall. He couldn’t stay in there too long or people would think something was up and he couldn’t afford for that to happen right now. He washed his hands needlessly and then walked back out into the common room. He went and sat over with his friends and slipped into their conversation as seamlessly as he always did, avoiding looking Remus in the eyes. 

“What are you guys talking about?” He sat down on the floor in between James and Remus’ chairs.

“The fact that Wormy here is very very thirsty.” James hit Peter on the arm.

“We’ve known that for years, thats nothing new.” He laughed and Peter hid his face in his hands. 

Sirius couldn’t help but chance a glance at Remus, only to find him looking right back at him and they both looked away quickly. 

“Are you okay baby?” He heard a female voice behind him and felt Ellie’s hands snake around over his shoulders and rub down over his chest.

“Oh yeah, I’m fine.” He swallowed and glanced up at Remus self consciously. He wasn’t looking back. “I’ll see you tomorrow Elz? I just wanna hang with the guys for a bit.”

“Yeah sure baby.” She removed her hands and pressed a kiss to his lips which he returned reluctantly, “I’ll see you tomorrow.”

She walked away and he looked down into his lap, not daring to look up at Remus again. He wasn’t exactly sure of what he was afraid of seeing in his eyes- him caring or him not. Both seemed crazily scary and painful. 

“Mate, she is all over you!” James grinned, hitting Sirius on the back. “I wish Lily was that into me, I’m still working on getting a weekly date from her.”

“Yeah, she is.” He agreed and looked down at his hands.

“Why aren’t you all over that right now?” Peter sighed.

“Because I wanna spend time with you guys, is that a crime?”

“It is when one of the hottest girls in the school wants to get into your pants!”

“James would you shut up?” Sirius snapped.

“What?” James frowned.

“Just drop it. I don’t have to explain myself to you all the time.” He knew he probably wasn’t doing himself any favours being so defensive but he just didn’t want them pressing him about Ellie and making him feel even worse about the fact that he didn’t want to kiss her and that that wasn’t normal for a guy his age.

“Dude, chill I just wanted to figure out what’s going on with you.”

“Well,” he stood up, “maybe I don’t want you trying to figure out every little part of my brain. I’m going to go and take a nap. I’ll see you later.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *dramatic voiceover voice*  
> NEXT TIME ON SOMEBODY ELSE:
> 
> '“Fucking hell I’m so confused.”'


	5. Gorgeous Guitar God

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I don't know if you've noticed but I really enjoyed making these chapter titles :D
> 
> ~ i_ship_too_many_things <3

Remus watched Sirius’ retreating back as he stormed off up to their dormitory. 

“What the fuck’s wrong with him?” James frowned, “He’s only ever like that when he’s stressed.”

“Yeah but why would he be stressed now?” Peter said. “Everything’s going great for him right now.”

“I don’t know.” James admitted, “He was acting weird when we went out on that double date as well.”

“He was?” Remus looked up. “What was he doing?” He knew he shouldn’t be so excited by the prospect that he was acting weird. I didn’t mean anything but some part of him was screaming that it meant everything.

“He just barely talked to Ellie,” James pushed his glasses further up his nose, “he just seemed really disinterested.”

His heart skipped a beat and he swallowed to push back the excitement.

“He’s crazy.” Peter muttered.

“Maybe he’s gay.” James said. “Remus do you get vibes from him?”

Remus quelled his fluttering heart and looked over at him and frowned. “Vibes?”

“Yeah, like gay vibes.”

“I don’t know, how am I supposed to know?” he sighed.

“Cause you’re… you know,” he flailed his arms around wildly.

“Gay?” he pointed out the obvious.

“Yeah, that.” 

Remus rolled his eyes, “you can say the word to me you know, it’s not off limits.”

“We just don’t exactly know how this stuff works.” Peter frowned.

“I don’t really know either.” Remus admitted, he wasn’t exactly experienced in being out, he’d only been doing it for a grand total of one day now.

“Maybe you should go up and talk to him?”

“Me?” Remus frowned. “Why me?”

“Because if he’s gay then you can talk to him about it…” James tailed off, “or something.”

Remus ran his hands over his face and tried desperately to come up with some kind of resolution but all he could think about was the fact that Sirius was upstairs alone and upset and he had the chance to go and be there for him. “Fine I will go and talk to him.” Remus sighed and stood up, heading for the dorms, “But you guys owe me one.”

He walked up the stairs that led to the dorm rooms and died a little inside with every step knowing that he was getting closer and closer to Sirius. His mind was going into overdrive with all the information James had given about their double date. Sirius wasn’t that interested in Ellie? That didn’t mean he was interested in Remus, he had to remind himself. He just wasn’t interested in that one particular girl for whatever reason. And maybe James was wrong, maybe Sirius just wasn’t as good at expressing his feelings as everyone thought. But that couldn’t stop Remus from hoping. That, added to the little look that Sirius had given him when Ellie had been all over him had made his heart skip a beat because he had looked guilty.

Remus reached the door to their dormitory and edged it open. As the door swung open the sound of Sirius’ guitar reached his ears. He smiled and closed the door behind him. The curtains around Sirius’ bed were closed and he was playing loudly and so hadn’t noticed the door opening and shutting. So Remus leant back against the door and just listened for a minute. Sirius hardly ever played in front of anyone and so Remus took his time to savour the sound of it. He played really well and the sounds of his strumming flooded the room with beauty. Remus shook himself as he felt himself feeling crazy cheesy but it didn’t exactly work out. He could help but feel the music as some kind of extension of Sirius’ soul and it was as if he was pouring his heart out through his fingers and into the room.

It was only when Sirius’ rhythm faltered and he stopped playing that he spoke, “Fucking hell I’m so confused.” 

Remus swallowed hard and cleared his throat- he couldn’t keep himself hidden anymore, “hey.”

“Oh, shit,” he heard scrambling noises and then Sirius’ head popped out from behind the curtain as he pushed it open. “How long have you been there?”

“Not long.” Remus sighed and walked over to the bed. He picked up the guitar and sat down on the bed in its place.”You’re really good at this.”

“Not really, I’m off my game right now.” Sirius sighed and shifted back to sit against the headboard.

“How come?”

He paused before answering, “I don’t know, I don’t want to talk about it.”

“Are you sure?”

“Yeah, I’m sure.” He sighed.

“Okay.” Remus nodded. “What song was that you were playing just now?”

“Oh God this is embarrassing.” He laughed, “I uhh… wrote it myself.”

“Really?” He widened his eyes, his heart fluttering a little. “I didn’t know you wrote music.”

“Well I’m full of surprises.” 

“Aren’t you just.” Remus smiled.

“Did James send you up here to talk to me?”

He sighed, trying to think through the best way to phrase the conversation he’d had downstairs in common room, “he just thought you might be more likely to tell me what’s going on with you.”

“Why would he think that?” Sirius spoke defensively.

Remus frowned, “I don’t know. But you know you can tell me anything.”

“Yeah I know,” Sirius sighed, “but you don’t have to be all sappy about it.”

Remus laughed, “I’m sorry.”

“Don’t worry about it.”

“Now are you gonna play this song for me or what?” Remus held the guitar out to Sirius, blatantly pushing his luck. 

“Am I what?”

“I want you to play it for me.” Remus shook the guitar and Sirius took it reluctantly. 

“Fine I will play for you,” Sirius sighed, “just this one time.”

Remus smiled and sat back on the bed stretching his legs out and watching as Sirius began to strum self-consciously before sinking into the music and playing with more confidence as Remus watched and tried desperately not to fall more and more in love with him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *dramatic voiceover voice*  
> NEXT TIME ON SOMEBODY ELSE
> 
> '“I guess she’s just not my type,” he looked over at Remus, “or something… else.”'


	6. Repression is Required

Sirius looked up self-consciously after his last strum and took in Remus’ reaction. He squirmed a little as Remus clapped for him, he traced Remus’ arms with his eyes and he couldn’t help but remember his imagined makeout session with the other boy. He shook himself and forced a smile. “You flatter me.”

“You’re good!”

Sirius shoved his guitar under his bed. “That is enough of that.”

“Okay.”

Sirius watched Remus more and sighed slowly, he couldn’t help but be constantly drawn to him and thinking of kissing him and trying to figure out who on earth that guy was that Remus liked. 

“Moony?”

“Yeah pads?”

He took a deep breath, “how did you know you were… into guys?” He waited with bated breath for Remus to reply, hoping he hadn’t overstepped a boundary or just given away what had been on his mind.

“Wow, I don’t know.” Remus frowned, “I guess I just knew I wasn’t into girls that much. And you know that game of spin the bottle that we played with some of the girls in year 8?” Sirius nodded, “I just didn’t feel anything when I kissed any of them.”

“Oh.” Sirius swallowed hard, reminded sharply of all the kisses he’d shared with Ellie and the distinct lack of fireworks. “And you feel something with guys?”

“Well I…” Remus rubbed his neck, “yeah I do.”

“When did you kiss a guy?” Sirius frowned.

“Summer last year. He was just this guy I met and we made out a bit. It was nice but I don’t like him or anything.”

“Oh yeah, cause there’s that guy you like here isn’t there.” Sirius raised his eyebrows and Remus covered his face with his hands.

“Not you as well.” 

Sirius laughed, slightly disappointed but passing it off, “Sorry I won’t ask. But you know you can tell me anything.”

“Go away and stop turning my psychology back on me okay?” 

“Okay,” Sirius chuckled.

“Why were you asking about me being gay anyway?” Remus asked casually and Sirius tensed before forcing himself to relax. 

“Oh I was just wondering, you know.” 

“Yeah of course,” Remus nodded, “I’m glad you’re making an effort, I’m not sure that James and Peter really get it.”

“Just give them a bit of time,” Sirius tightened his ponytail, “they might take a bit of time to get used to it but they care about you, they don’t mind.” 

“Yeah I know.” Remus smiled, “I’m just glad it worked out okay, I’d just been building it up in my head for years, you know. Making a mountain out of a molehill so to speak.”

“Yeah, I know how you feel.” Sirius nodded. He considered in that moment just giving everything up and telling Remus that he thought he might be gay. Or even just scrambling across the bed to him and kissing him. But he couldn’t do that. He just didn’t know quite how to formulate the words into a sentence that made sense and could actually convey what he was feeling and the confusion warring inside of him. 

He sighed. “I think I might break up with Ellie.”

“Really?” Remus raised his eyebrows, “How come? You’ve only been going out for a week or so.”

“I know but I just don’t think I’m that into her and I wouldn’t want to lead her on or anything.” Sirius figured that was a starting point for expressing his feelings.

“Yeah that makes sense. Is she just not your type or is there something… else?”

Sirius gulped as his mind flashed back to his fantasy of kissing Remus in Ellie’s place, “Uhh… something like that.” He pulled his hair out of it’s ponytail and let it hang down in front of his face like a curtain. “So this guy that you like,” Remus groaned, “no no no don’t worry I’m not asking you who he is, do you think he likes you back?”

“Oh I don’t know,” he sighed and turned around and lay down on the bed so his head was now roughly level with Sirius’ butt, “I don’t even know if he likes guys.” 

“That’s gotta be tough.” Sirius sighed and looked down at Remus and couldn’t help but smile at his serene face as he lay there eyes closed.

“It doesn’t make things easy that’s for sure.” 

They stayed like that for a minute or so neither of them saying anything but Sirius sneaking glances as Remus and trying to push back the thoughts of them kissing. As he pushed them back his mind was filled with one overwhelming thought- he was gay. There was no denying now really that he was attracted to girls. Remus had said that he didn’t feel anything when he kissed girls and Sirius didn’t either. And then there was the matter of Remus occupying his thoughts constantly and the fact that he wanted to kiss him so much more that his own girlfriend. He pushed his hair back and sighed before sliding further down the bed until he was lying beside Remus and his arm was practically pressed against the other man’s side. 

The sound of the door opening caused Sirius to jerk his arm away from Remus and he shifted over slightly as James and Peter entered the room.

“Hey, are you okay now Padfoot?” James asked as the pair of them sat on the edge of Remus’ bed to be close to the other two.

“Yeah I’m fine.” He sat up and curled up around his knees. 

“Good.” 

Sirius could see the silent exchange occurring between his friends and he rolled his eyes at what James thought was a covert signal. 

“How can I break up with Ellie?” he spoke up.

“You’re breaking up with Ellie?” Peter frowned. “How come?”

“I guess she’s just not my type,” he looked over at Remus, “or something… else.”

“Okay? James frowned, “you’ve just gotta tell her.” 

“Yeah.” The others nodded.

“I just don’t want to lead her on when I’m not into her. You know?”

“Yeah of course.” 

“I’ll do it tomorrow though, I’m tired now.” He hit Remus in the arm, “Fuck off my bed.” 

Remus rolled his eyes and stood up and Sirius smiled, “night boys!”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *dramatic voiceover voice*  
> NEXT TIME ON SOMEBODY ELSE
> 
> '"Why did you break up with Ellie, the whole story.”'


	7. Evasion Equals Effort

“Right we are playing truth or dare again, everyone circle up.” James called everyone over and Remus frowned.

“It’s a Monday night, what are you on about?” But they all circled up on the floor again. 

“We can play on a Monday there are no limits to this game.” Sirius laughed and sat down in between James and Remus. Remus looked up at him and the space between them and bit back a half smile half sigh.

“Who’s first then?” Peter asked, settling down on Remus’ other side. 

“Remus!” James smiled, “Truth or dare?”

“Dare, I am not falling for that one, I know your game.” Remus smirked.

“Okay.” James smirked back, “I dare you to tell us who you like.”

“That is so against the rules!” He laughed, his heart racing, avoiding eye contact with Sirius once again.

“Fine,” Peter chipped in, “then we dare you to take us to the person you like.”

“That’s barely any better.” He sighed.

“Just let him be guys, he doesn’t want to tell us it’s fine.” Sirius said and Remus looked over at him for the first time since the question had been asked and gave him a small smile of thanks.

“Oh like you don’t want to know as well.” James scoffed.

“Of course I want to know but it’s up to Moony if he wants to tell us or not.” Sirius sat back.

“Alright then,” James gave up, “Sirius, truth or dare?”

“Uhh… truth.” He paused for a second before muttering under his breath, “shit.”

“Got something to hide have we Padfoot?”

“Uhh, no of course not.” Sirius blurted out quickly.

Remus watched the exchange in silence trying to read Sirius’ body language and failing desperately, he didn’t exactly know how to measure these types of situations. 

“Good let’s go then.” James sat and thought for a minute rubbing his hand over his chin as if stroking a beard that he most definitely did not have. “Okay, I’ve got it, why did you break up with Ellie, the whole story.”

Sirius blushed and Remus frowned. 

“I told you guys already, she’s just not my type.”

“Is that really it?” James raised his eyebrows. Sirius blushed more. “I knew it wasn’t everything. Spill.”

“Well I…” Sirius paused and Remus chanced a look up at him his cheeks were red and Remus couldn’t help but imagine other situations that would make Sirius blush like that and Remus had to shake himself to get those thoughts out of his head. “I just didn’t think it would be fair for me to be with her when I… I think I like someone else.”

“Oh fucking hell this is better than I thought!” James laughed, “Who is it?” 

“That’s not how the game works, it’s your turn now James.”

“Fine, truth, I can’t be bothered to get up and do a dare.” 

“How far have you gotten with Lily?” Peter asked.

“Wormy you sneaky little bastard are you trying to live through my sex life?” James laughed.

Peter blushed, “no of course not, I was just wondering, it’s been a couple of months now.”

“Fine, we’ve made out.”

“She plays the long game then huh?” Sirius laughed.

“No, she just wants to be sure I’m not using her.” James sighed.

“You wouldn’t do that though, you’ve been chasing her for almost 6 years now I think it’s clear that you’re in it for a bit more than a quick lay.” Remus frowned. 

“I know but I’m just trying to respect her, I like her and I want this to work out.”

“Deep.” Sirius laughed.

“Shut up man.” James shoved Sirius in the arm and Sirius fell to the side into Remus who gasped. 

“Hey.” Sirius smiled up at Remus from his place in his lap.

“Hi there.” He grinned back, trying desperately to not blush or die or lean down and kiss him or something equally embarrassing and ridiculous. 

“I’m gonna stay here for a bit if that’s okay?” 

“Yeah sure.” He spoke calmly, attempting to pass off his excitement and happiness as casual friendly care. He was just a guy who’s best friend’s head was in his lap. That was it. Nothing more. No need to panic or get unnecessarily turned on at the proximity of Sirius’ head to his crotch or the weight of his body on his legs. It was all normal and fine.

“Peter’s turn!”

“Dare.” 

“Only dares in this room please because I am very comfortable and I do not intend on moving anytime soon,” said Sirius.

“Okay.” James nodded, “I dare you to… send an email to Professor McGonagoll telling her how your day is going.”

“Weird but okay,” Peter pulled out his phone and started composing an email speaking outloud what he was writing.

“Well I had to think of something for you to do without leaving the dorm room seeing as Sirius is a lazy bum.”

“I’m not lazy, just comfortable.” Sirius poked Remus in the stomach and he groaned.

“You’re so rude to me.” Remus laughed as he looked down at the man in his lap. 

“You love me really.”

Remus blushed but attempted to hide it by covering Sirius’ eyes with a light slap-like touch.

“Okay sent.” 

“Back to Remus.” James smiled.

“Not again James,” he groaned.

“Yes, again. And you have to do two seeing as you didn’t do any of the other ones. One truth one dare.”

“Fine, but play nice James.” 

“I never play nice,” he grinned and pushed his glasses up his nose, “dare-give one of us your phone and let us send whatever text we want to whoever we want.”

“Okay,” he pulled out his phone and unlocked it handing it down to Sirius.

“And your truth is… how many guys have you ever kissed?” 

Remus sat back a little, trying to get a better angle to see what Sirius was writing. “Uhh, 2.”

“2?” Sirius stopped typing and looked up. “You only told me about one!”

“You only asked me about one!” Remus rolled his eyes at Sirius.

“Was this another guy at summer?” 

“Not exactly.” 

“Woah, you have to tell me!” 

“I do not.” Remus laughed, “keep typing you idiot.”

“I am offended that you didn’t tell me.” Sirius left the phone on his lap.

“Maybe I’ll tell you later.” 

“Good, you better,”

“Are you guys done?” Peter asked.

“He just needs to finish writing this text.” Remus flicked Sirius’ ear.

“Ow, rude.” But then he picked up the phone again and kept typing.

“Let me see it!” Remus placed his hand on top of Sirius’ and angled the phone so that he could see the screen. He tried to remain unaffected by the feeling of Sirius’ skin against his. 

“No get off that’s not in the rules.” Sirius batted the invading hand away. 

“Fine but show me before you send it.”

“Fine.” Sirius finished up the text and held it up for him to see. “There you go.”

“You cheeky bastard,” Remus grinned after reading it and Sirius pressed send before handing the phone back. Then Remus froze. “Who was that you sent it to?” 

“Rhys.” Sirius frowned.

“Welsh Rhys or other Rhys?”

“Welsh Rhys.”

“Oh shit.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *dramatic voiceover voice*  
> NEXT TIME ON SOMEBODY ELSE:
> 
> '“Shit.” Sirius handed the phone back.'


	8. Rhys and Remus Regret

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I've just started a tumblr if you want to go and follow me?!?!
> 
> You can find me here: https://www.tumblr.com/blog/i-ship-too-many-things/
> 
> As always I hope you enjoy the chapter
> 
> ~ i_ship_too_many_things <3
> 
> (I also changed my username)

“What’s wrong?” Sirius frowned, sitting up.

“Shit this is bad.” Remus pulled out his phone and pulled up the message again.

“What the hell’s going on guys?” James asked.

“What did you send him?” Peter chimed in.

“I just asked him if he wanted to hang out sometime.” Sirius said defensively looking at Remus apprehensively.

“Look.” Remus held out his phone towards Sirius and he shifted closer so they could both read at the same time. He scrolled back through some more messages and pointed at where Sirius should start reading from.

He sat forward to look at the messages and scrolled through them freely.

 

**9:21 5/6**

 

 **Rhys:** _I really enjoyed tonight_  
**Remus:** _So did I_  
**Rhys:** _We should do this again sometime_  
**Remus:** _Yeah absolutely_  
**Rhys:** _Next time we’ll have to go somewhere a bit less out of the way_  
**Remus:** _I thought that the restaurant was nice why don’t we just go there again?_  
**Rhys:** _Are you trying to stop people we know from seeing us?_  
**Remus:** _I just don’t wan’t people to know_  
**Rhys:** _I can’t keep doing this Reem_  
**Remus:** _I’m sorry I can’t_  
**Rhys:** _I don’t think this is going to work out_  
**Remus:** _I’m sorry I just can’t Rhys_

 

“Shit.” Sirius handed the phone back. “Was he the guy? The Second guy?”

“Yeah.”

“Shit.” He repeated looking up at Remus. “I’m so sorry.”

“Why didn’t you scroll back through the messages a bit before you picked him?”

“I don’t know I didn’t want to invade your privacy or something.” Sirius sighed, moving closer to Remus, “I’m so fucking sorry, I didn’t know.”

“Don’t blame yourself, I should’ve checked it more carefully before you sent it.”

“Are you gonna explain what’s going on?” James frowned.

“I dated Rhys for a month or so 2 years ago.” Remus looked down at his hands.

“And it didn’t exactly end the best way.” Sirius took Remus’ phone from him to look through the texts again.

“Yeah.” Remus nodded slowly.

“Shit, okay.” James sat forward, “What do we do? How do we sort this?”

“I don’t know.” Remus admitted.

“Well how about I send another message just explaining what happened and saying sorry?” Sirius suggested looking up at Remus alone for confirmation and affirmation.

“I don’t know.” He sighed, pushing his hair back, “we just left it so badly I feel like I can’t just push it away like it never happened.”

Sirius nodded quietly. “What do you want to do then?”

“I’m not sure. I think I should go out with him.” Remus looked down and Sirius tried not to let his heart stop.

“Like on a date?” Peter asked.

“Is he the guy you like?” James asked.

Sirius perked up at that and pulled himself out of his self-made cocoon of regret.

“No, it’s not him.” Sirius felt a sigh of relief wash over him. “Not on a date, just to talk out what happened between us.”

All three of them nodded slowly, not quite knowing what to say.

At that moment Remus’ phone vibrated in Sirius’ hand and he jumped. He checked the screen and dropped the phone like it was infected with the plague. “Shit.”

“What are you doing?” Remus frowned.”

“He replied.”

“Shit.”

All four boys looked at the phone that was now lying face down on the floor.

“What did he say?”

“I don’t know I just saw his name and panicked.” Sirius said.

“Well we have to look.”

“I’m not doing it.” Remus held his hands up.

Sirius looked over at him and sighed, “I’ll do it.”

He reached forward for the phone and lit up the screen. “Okay. He said ‘Like a date or just friends?’” He looked up at Remus.

“Okay that’s fine. I can deal with that. Give it here?”

Sirius handed the phone over and Remus unlocked it and began typing a response.

“So you’re gonna talk it out and then what?” said James.

“I don’t know. If he wants to date again I might do it. I don’t know.” He rubbed his neck.

“What about the guy that you like?” Sirius frowned.

“I don’t know. I don’t think he likes me.” Sirius was struck by the fact that Remus maintained steady strong eye contact with him as he spoke, “and if he did then he’d speak up about it. I can’t wait for one guy forever.”

“How long have you liked this guy?” Peter frowned.

“A year and a half or something stupid.” Remus sighed.

“Woah.”

“What if this guy likes you and he just hasn’t told you?” Sirius asked what he considered to be a risky question but he had to know the answer to it. With every sentence Remus was speaking Sirius could feel him slipping away and his imagined make out sessions were seeming less and less possible and suddenly Remus was making out with Welsh Rhys and not him and he didn’t like the idea of that anywhere near as much.

“I don’t know it just feels like if he liked me he’d tell me.”

“But you haven’t told him, right?”

“No, but it’s different.”

“How?”

“He at least knows that I’m gay.”

“He does?” Sirius started.

“Yeah.” Remus mumbled.

How many people knew Remus was gay at this school? As far as he was aware it was just the three of them sat in that room and Welsh Rhys. And it wasn’t Rhys. Which meant it was one of the three of them. Which meant there was a 1 in 3 chance of it being him. But that meant that Sirius had to actually think about if he liked Remus, and that meant facing up to his emotions. And that was real fucking scary.

“We’re going to talk out on the grounds tomorrow afternoon after classes.” Remus diverted the conversation back to Rhys.

“Cool.”

Yeah, so cool. Sirius frowned to himself. He didn’t like the fact that the thought of Remus hanging out with Rhys, a guy that he had previously kissed, pissed him off. But it did, by God it did. He couldn’t help but imagine their conversation and how it would end with Rhys asking Remus if he wasn’t interested and dating him again and Remus saying yes. He didn’t like it. And that scared the shit out of him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *dramatic voice over voice*  
> NEXT TIME ON SOMEBODY ELSE:
> 
> '“Are you sure that Sirius isn’t into you?”'


	9. Fixed Fall-Outs

“I’m nervous.” Remus sighed and ran his hands absentmindedly through Sirius hair - he was laid down with his head in Remus’ lap again.

“You’ll be fine,” Sirius smiled weakly and Remus couldn’t help but frown. Sirius had been acting so weirdly all day since last night and Remus didn’t get it. He had been oddly quiet and reserved the whole time and it was so weird, Remus could not figure out for the life of him why and it bugged him. 

“Are you okay?” Remus lowered his vice a little, glancing over at James and Peter who were playing some random card game that they’d made up about a meter away. 

“Yeah, I’m fine.” Sirius frowned and Remus nodded hurriedly.

“Sorry, you just seemed a bit off since last night.” Part of Remus kept telling him it was because of Rhys and that maybe Sirius was jealous but that was wishful thinking and it was exactly what Remus had to squash out of his mind if he was going to get over Sirius after all this time. That wasn’t going to be easy to do anyway, especially with Sirius’ new habit of putting his head in Remus’ lap. 

“No, no I’m fine no issue.” 

“Okay.” Remus nodded slowly and tangled his fingers further into Sirius’ hair. He knew he shouldn’t be doing that, touching him that way, but he couldn’t help himself when he was right there. 

“Hey Remus?” Remus started at the familiar voice and the feeling of Rhys’ fingers on his shoulder.

“Hey,” Remus nodded, tapping the bottom of Sirius’ head. “Up.” Sirius sat up and Remus pushed himself to his feet, turning to face Rhys. 

“Shall we… go somewhere… away?” Rhys asked.

“Yeah,” Remus nodded, “I’ll see you later Pads.”

“Curfew’s at 10 remember!” Sirius called after them as they started to walk away and Remus turned and held his middle finger up at him as Sirius stuck his tongue out in return. 

“Sorry about him.” Remus indicated Sirius. 

“Don’t worry about it. Are you two…?” Rhys trailed off.

“Together?” 

Rhys nodded.

“No, we’re just friends.”

“Oh sorry, you just seemed really close.”

“We are.” Remus nodded as they walked, “but we’re just friends.” 

Rhys seemed to nod knowingly and Remus frowned, hoping he didn’t think that he knew what was going on there. They walked over to a quiet area by the lake and they sat down. 

“So, what did you want to talk about?” Rhys smiled.

“I just wanted to apologise for how everything went down between us.” 

“Don’t worry about it Reem, I’m cool with it. You weren’t ready to be out and it was unfair for me to push you.” 

“No, it was unfair for me to put you in a situation where I was hiding you away. You didn’t deserve that.” 

“We just weren’t in the right place for each other then. But you seem to be doing better now, you’d at least told the boys you were seeing me just now right?”

“Yeah, I told them about me and they know about what happened between us.” 

“I’m happy for you.” Remus looked down as Rhys spoke.

“That sounds super cheesy.”

“That’s because it is.” They laughed. “So, you told the guys that you’re gay?”

“Yeah, I did. Mostly by accident but it worked out good.”

“Good,” he paused, “Are you sure that Sirius isn’t into you?”

Remus spluttered, “What?”

“It’s just the way that he’s acting around you and especially if he knows you’re gay - most straight guys wouldn’t be like that with a friend they knew liked guys.”

Remus’ heart skipped a beat. “You really think so?”

Rhys laughed, “yeah, I do. And by the looks of things you like him too.” 

Remus sighed, looking up at Rhys who was smiling at him. There was no denying anything from that gaze. “Is it that obvious?” 

“Kinda.” Remus hung his head and laughed, “but I know what I’m looking for, straight guys don’t see it, and if he fancies you he won’t see it either.”

Remus fell back on the grass and groaned. “I hate this.” 

“How long have you liked him?” 

“A year and a half.” Remus grumbled and turned to the side which was a mistake because Sirius and the others were right in his eye line and he was able to watch Sirius tying up his hair in a ponytail a strand of hair falling out and into his face. 

“That’s a long time.”

“You’re telling me.” 

“Well I think you should ask him out.” 

Remus rolled over to look back at Rhys, “you’re crazy.”

“What? Why?”

“You know how bad I am at relationships and romance,” Remus sat up.

“Yeah, I do,” Rhys nodded, “but you really like him and I’m sure he likes you, so do it.” 

“I just don’t want to lose what we have already.” 

“I get that, but if it works out it’d be so much better, besides he seems like he wouldn’t be too weirded out anyway even if he was straight.” 

Remus groaned, “I don’t knowwwww,”

“Well text me if you need anything I’ll be happy to help out,” he stood up.

“You’re going?” Remus grumbled, looking up at him. 

“Yes I am, I have a hot date tonight.” Rhys patted Remus’ head.

“Who is it?” Remus pushed himself to his feet. 

“Joe,” Rhys rubbed his neck.

“You’re right, he is hot, how long have you been going out?”  
“This will be our second date.”

“Fancy,” Remus laughed, “good luck!”

“And you,” Rhys turned away and headed back towards the school building.

Remus watched him go for a minute before turning away to walk back towards the boys. As he was walking Sirius turned his head and saluted to him. Remus laughed and came back over to the boys, flopping down in front of Sirius who immediately turned and lay down with his head in Remus’ lap. His heart skipped a beat as he buried his fingers into Sirius’ hair and pulled his ponytail out. 

“How did it go?” Sirius looked up at him and smiled.

“It went great.” 

“Good.” Sirius spoke quietly.

“So are you two together again?” 

“No, we’re not.”

“Oh okay.” Sirius smiled and settled further into Remus’ lap, “You holding out for your mystery man?”

“Something like that,” Remus laughed and dug his finger’s further into Sirius’ hair.

“Why’d you take out my ponytail?”

“I can’t play with your hair properly if it’s up.” Remus said matter of factly and Sirius grinned.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *dramatic voiceover voice*  
> NEXT TIME ON SOMEBODY ELSE:
> 
> '“I can play you your favourite song for you if you want?”'


	10. Texting is a Terror Threat

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm back at school now and it's my literal hell. I've gotten the entirety of this pic written in advance so it won't effect the uploads so don't worry and I'm gonna work on weekends a lot to work on the things still to come. 
> 
> Just a little update on my life. 
> 
> ~ i_ship_too_many_things <3

Remus laughed and started texting again. Sirius looked up from his place in Remus’ lap and frowned. “Is that Rhys again?”

“Yeah.” Remus nodded and one of his hands dropped down to tangle in Sirius’ hair again. He smiled at the weight of the hand in his hair and sighed inwardly every time he felt the now familiar tug on his hair. But it wasn’t quite enough to pull Sirius’ mind away from the constant texting backwards and forwards between Remus and his ex. It wasn’t that Sirius was jealous because he wasn’t. At all. He just felt like there was something going on that he wasn’t privy to and that bugged him. He just wanted Remus to trust him with everything and anything. 

He sighed heavily.

“Are you okay?” Remus looked down at him carefully. 

“Yeah I’m fine.” Sirius tried to nod but stopped himself when he realised his current position. “Would you pass me my guitar?”

“Yeah, sure.” Remus nodded and reached under Sirius’s bed that they were sat on and pulled out the guitar. 

Sirius plucked the guitar from Remus’ hands and started playing random chords softly. 

“That’s nice.” Remus smiled and Sirius looked up at him carefully.

“You like it?” 

Remus nodded in response.

“I call it ‘I just made this shit up right now,’”

Remus laughed, “Well whatever it is, it’s good.”

“Do you want me to play something for you?” 

“What can you play?”

“I can play you your favourite song for you if you want?” Sirius looked up hopefully and his insides tingled as Remus’ eyes lit up.

“You know what my favourite song is?”

“Not only do I know it but I can also play it.” Sirius smiled and shifted slightly so that he could move forwarded have more leverage to look back up at the other boy. 

“Go on then.” Remus grinned and set his phone aside. 

Sirius felt a spike of something that felt a lot like victory run through him as if he had just gotten one up on Rhys. In your face Rhys, Remus wants to listen to me play guitar, you’re not interesting enough for him anymore! Sirius blinked quickly and reeled himself back in. He placed his fingers on the frets and began to strum out the opening chords to Somebody Else by The 1975. 

As he strummed and plucked out the melody he began to sing the opening lines and before long Remus was singing along and they were both singing and Sirius was playing. Sirius could feel Remus’ voice vibrating through his body and into his own. He sighed between verses and leant into the touch of Remus’ fingers in his hair and on his scalp. They kept singing and playing and suddenly all Sirius could think about was all of the points at which their body connected and the sounds of their voices melding together. Once they reached the second verse Sirius didn’t know the words and had to stop singing but Remus carried on and so Sirius kept playing for him and listening to it all. He finished playing and looked up at Remus who sighed and ran his fingers through Sirius’ hair and onto his forehead before dipping back down. 

“That was beautiful.” Remus sighed.

“Yeah,” Sirius nodded slightly, “you have a lovely voice.”

“Do I?” Remus blushed and it drove Sirius wild. It made him look adorable and it reminded him of the blush inducing activities he had shared with Remus in his imagination.

“Yeah,” 

“Thanks.” Remus looked down at Sirius smiled up at him slowly. 

The phone that lay beside them vibrated and Remus snatched it up quickly. The moment was broken and his precious small victory over Rhys was lost as Remus resumed his incessant texting. 

“What’re you two talking about anyway?” Sirius poked Remus in the stomach. 

“Nothing.”

“Nothing?”

“Sorry, I’m just trying to get used to being able to tell you guys stuff.” Remus sighed.

“So tell me stuff.” Sirius said.

“We’re just talking about Rhys’ boyfriend.” 

“Oh, he has a boyfriend does he?” Sirius smiled broadly. 

“Yes he does, they’ve gone out a few times it’s going well for him, he’s happy.”

“That’s good.” 

“Why are you suddenly so interested in Rhys’ love life?” Remus asked.

“I’m not.” Sirius frowned. 

“You just seemed really happy when I said he had a boyfriend.”

Sirius floundered for an answer that made him sound semi sane, “Well I was just glad that you weren’t gonna start dating him again.”

“Why do you not want me to date Rhys?” Remus asked.

Sirius paused, “because I want you to get together with your mystery guy.”

“You do?” Remus raised his eyebrows.

“Yeah,” Sirius smiled, “I want you to be happy.” 

“Thank you, you’re adorable.” Remus laughed and pressed Sirius’ nose lightly with the tip of his finger. 

“Stop you’re ruining my reputation.” Sirius batted his hands away as Remus laughed. 

“Your reputation? We’re the only people in the room.” 

“The point stands.”

“Not really.”

Sirius sighed and pushed his guitar away from him to the foot of the bed. He looked up at Remus who was texting again and his breath hitched. Although Rhys was slightly less of a threat to him he couldn’t help but feel there was still something going on that he wasn’t a part of. He hated that his mind was thinking that way. He hated that he was so blatantly jealous of Rhys and felt like he was a threat to him being with Remus because he hadn’t even given himself enough time to think through being with his friend and what that would mean and if that was what he wanted. He knew that Remus made his heart skip a beat every time their eyes connected and he knew he loved the feeling of his fingers in his hair and he knew that he wanted to make out with him and that he though that that would be better for him than kissing Ellie. But he didn’t know if he was ready to have a relationship with a guy - with one of his best friends no less. That was a big step. But maybe it wasn’t even that big. Was it even that much of a stretch from where he and Remus already were to them dating? They already hung out alone regularly, they already touched each other near obsessively. The only real change would be the kissing and the physical side of a relationship and Sirius knew that he was excited by the prospect of that with Remus. So maybe he should just go for it and try and give this whole thing a go. But that meant that he had to deal with everything that came along with dating a guy. Namely the fact that he was dating a guy. He’d pretty much accepted that he was into guys because there was no denying the pure physical and chemical attraction he felt to Remus. But there was something different about knowing that himself and letting that out into the world and to his friends and making that a part of his daily life outside of his own head. 

He sighed. Everything was so fucking difficult and he fucking hated it all.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *dramatic voiceover voice*  
> NEXT TIME ON SOMEBODY ELSE:
> 
> '“Anyone who wouldn’t be into you is crazy Moony.”'


	11. Back Off Boys

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hope you like it...!
> 
> ~ i_ship_too_many_things <3

Remus sighed and looked up at the dark red fabric of the curtains that hung around his bed. All he could think about lately was Sirius. It had been like that for a while, with Sirius playing at the back of his mind. But recently it had felt different. Sirius felt closer to him somehow, and not just physically with all of the increased touching and their now habitual standard method of sitting together with Sirius’ head in Remus’ lap and Remus’ fingers running through his hair, but also in the way they were interacting. Sirius had played his guitar for Remus twice now and they had sung together. They talked about how they were feeling together and they were just so much more in sync. That sounded awfully cheesy but Remus found himself getting that way recently. He wanted so badly to just take the plunge and ask Sirius if he wanted more from their relationship but he still couldn’t help but feel that he was just seeing what he wanted to and that Sirius was just what he always was. That must be it. That made more sense. 

“Are you okay?” He’d almost forgotten that Rhys and his boyfriend Joe were in the room.

“Yeah, I’m fine, why?” He frowned, shaking away his thoughts.

“You’re just sat alone and you’re normally with the boys.”

“Yeah I just needed to think for a little bit.”

“We can go if you want. You just said that you wanted to chat to me.”

“No it’s fine I’m done thinking.” Remus turned further towards the other two boys. “How are the two of you doing?”

“Good. It’s going good.” Rhys smiled as he looked over at Joe and Remus couldn’t help but feel jealous, not because he liked Rhys because he didn’t, but because he wanted to be able to look at Sirius like that and have him look back that way and just be so unabashedly attracted to each other. 

“You thinking about him?”

“Huh?” Remus looked up, blushing slightly. Rhys raised his eyebrows and Remus looked down again. “No go away.”

“You’re not very good at hiding your emotions Reem.”

“I beg to differ.”

“It’s just so obvious.”

“I hate you.” Remus sighed and leant back against his headboard.

“No you don’t.” 

“Fine.” He grumbled. It was then that the door swung open and Sirius entered, his hair swinging in front of his eyes as he walked over to join Remus on his bed.

“Hey, you third wheeling?” Sirius sat down on the bed practically on top Remus.

“A little.” Remus blushed and placed his hand on Sirius’ back, guiding him off his lap so that they were sitting next to each other. 

“Sorry, I didn’t sit in the best place did I?” He shifted in his new position and decided to drape his legs over Remus. “What you guys talking about?”

Remus placed his hands on Sirius’ leg instinctually.

“Just about how Remus needs to get a wiggle on so he can stop being a third wheel and we can do double dates.” Rhys said casually and Remus shot him a look, which was returned with a broad smile.

“Oo, Mystery Man.” Sirius grinned, looping his arm around Remus’ hip to keep himself sat forward. 

“Yeah.” Joe laughed.

“Just ask him out Reem.” 

“We’ve talked about this Rhys. He’s not into me.” Remus sighed as he felt all of the point of connection between his body and Sirius’.

“I very much doubt that.” Joe raised his eyebrows.

“Anyone who wouldn’t be into you is crazy Moony.” Sirius smiled and Remus’ heart skipped. Was he saying what he thought he was? Probably not. It was stupid to get his hopes up just to get them crushed the brutal reality of the fact that Sirius wasn’t ever going to like him.

“He’s not wrong Reem.” Rhys smiled, looking at Remus pointedly. He paused for a second before continuing, “anyway, Joe and I had better get going.” He stood up and took Joe’s hands to pull him up with him. 

Remus glared at their backs as they left the dorm, closing the door behind them.

"So those two seem to being doing well huh?" Sirius sparked a conversation.

"Yeah they're doing really well," Remus sighed.

"What? What's up?" Sirius frowned.

"Nothing," Remus leant back against the frame of the bed and Sirius curled closer into his body in response, "I just wish I had something like what they've got."

"With mystery man?"

Remus sighed and nodded, "yeah with mystery man." He looked down at Sirius who was looking up at him from his place rested against his shoulder. Remus smiled slightly before snapping his head up and looking away, he couldn't stare when Sirius was this close and could see everything. "It's just different than before you know with James and Lily and all that." 

"Yeah, I know." Remus felt Sirius nod against him, "it's different because it's closer to what you actually want."

"Yeah," Remus sighed. He didn't know how much longer he could keep doing all of this. Having Sirius so close to him constantly, having that almost permanent connection between their bodies and having all of these personal conversations in which it seemed like Sirius really understood him. It was all so close to what he wanted and yet so far away. Remus had gotten so lost in his thoughts at that moment that he hadn't realised he was now gazing down at Sirius who was looking back with this look in his eyes that was driving Remus wild. He couldn't let it go on like this anymore. He wanted more. 

It was then that Remus leant down and kissed Sirius. Their lips connected before Remus had even really clocked what was happening and what he was doing but he was there and he could taste Sirius on his lips and it was so overwhelmingly good. That is until he realised that Sirius wasn't kissing back. 

Oh god what had he done.

Remus pulled back and got off the bed suddenly. He looked down at Sirius where he had fallen slightly as Remus had moved and the look of pure shock on his face. 

"I'm so sorry," Remus began to mumble incoherently, "I don't know what I was doing I'm sorry." 

He turned on his heels and ran out of the dormitory. He had fucked up bad. He'd taken a gamble and it was a stupid stupid decision that was about to backfire massively. Sirius didn't like him. He didn't kiss back. And Remus had just ruined everything. 

He ran through the common room without stopping for the surprised shouts of his friends behind him and ran out of the school building entirely and ran through the grounds until he reached the edge of the lake. And only then, when there was no one else there to see him, he let himself fall to the floor and curl up, and let the sadness and the regret fully wash over him. 

He had kissed Sirius.

Sirius didn't kiss back.

Sirius didn't like him.

He had ruined everything.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *dramatic voiceover voice*  
> NEXT TIME ON SOMEBODY ELSE:
> 
> '"I messed up."'


	12. Panicking Puts People Off

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, I know a lot of your guys didn't appreciate the cliffhanger.... whoops.... so here's the next chapter.
> 
> I hope you enjoy it.
> 
> ~ i_ship_too_many_things <3

_Oh dear god._

_Dearest lord in heaven above._

_Sweet Jesus in the manger._

_What the hell just happened?_

Sirius felt like he couldn’t breathe. 

_Shit._

He sat bolt upright.

Remus had kissed him. 

_Shit._

He didn’t know what on earth he was meant to be doing right now. He couldn’t breathe properly. He could still feel Remus’ lips on his. Fireworks.

It was one of the best things that had happened to him. And he had frozen up, like an idiot. 

And now Remus was gone. 

Shit, he was such an idiot.

He pushed himself up off the bed and ran out of the dormitory down into the common room.

“Remus I-“ Sirius cut himself off as he looked over at his friends to find that the boy he was looking for was not there. “Where’s Remus?”

“He just ran through here a minute ago.” James frowned, “Why? What’s going on with him?” 

“Nothing.” He answered instinctually. “Do you know where he went?”

“We don’t know, he just ran through, didn’t even stop to talk to us.” 

“Shit.” Sirius sat down on the floor and put his head in his hands. It was only at that point as he sat that he really had a chance to think about what had happened. Remus had kissed him and it had been incredible. So incredible that he had frozen up like an idiot. He guessed there was no avoiding that he wanted to be with Remus anymore. And that probably made him gay. But Sirius couldn’t help but think that none of that really mattered at that precise moment. What really mattered was that Remus had ran away and that he no doubt thought that Sirius wasn’t interested.

“Seriously, dude what’s going on here?” James hit Sirius on the back of his head.

“Nothing, nothing.” He replied hurriedly. As much as he knew now that he was into Remus he still instinctively brushed over it and tried to keep it away from anyone else.

Sirius looked up to find James glaring at him pointedly.

“Nothing,” he insisted and stood up suddenly.

“Not happening.” Peter grabbed hold of his arm, “you are not going anywhere.”

“What the hell is happening right now? Since when did we become the people that talk about how we’re feeling all the time?”

“Since you and Remus needed to talk about feelings,” James sighed and stood up, “come on, we’re going upstairs and you’re telling us what’s going on.”

“I hate this,” Sirius sighed as he was pulled back up the stairs to the dorm room.

“No you don’t,” James smiled and pushed Sirius down to sit on the floor, “now tell us everything.”

“I can’t do this,” Sirius sighed, his mind was reeling, trying to figure if he wanted to tell his friends what had happened or if he even could, “it’s between me and Remus.” 

“Shut up, we’re your friends.” Peter sat down, “you can tell us anything.”

“This is the worst thing that’s ever happened to me,” Sirius paused. He needed to have someone to talk to. He trusted his friends. He sighed before replying, “he kissed me.”

“He did what?”

“Please don’t make me say it again. He kissed me,” Sirius repeated.

“Oh my god you’re the mystery man!” James’ eyes widened.

“Oh my god I’m the mystery man,” Sirius muttered. It felt stupid at that point that that hadn’t already occurred to him. But it seemed so obvious now that he’d heard it. And he loved the idea of it. He’d been obsessing over it for so long now, trying to figure out who it was and he knew that part of him had always been hoping it was him. And it was. And he’d screwed it up. “I messed up.” 

“What?” 

“I didn’t kiss him back,” 

“Did you want to?” 

He paused, “Yeah,”

“Then why didn’t you kiss back?”

“I froze okay!” Sirius said, “I didn’t know what to do!”

“You kiss back, you idiot!” James hit him in the arm, “Any idiot knows that.”

“I just panicked, I know I’m an idiot that’s why I was trying to find him to tell him that I like him!” he sighed and looked down, “God this is weird.”

“Nah,” Peter smiled, “We’re just helping two of our friends get together.”

“Oh God please don’t try and set us up, I can deal with this myself.”

“Can you though?” James laughed, “Have you even called him yet?”

“No of course I haven’t, I’ve been with you guys the whole time.”

“Well then call him, you idiot.” 

“Shut up, I’m calling him.” Sirius batted them away and pulled out his phone. He stood up as he dialled Remus and walked out of the dormitory and stood in the corridor away from his friends. The phone rang and Sirius waited, bouncing on his feet, willing Remus to pick up. The phone continued to ring and Sirius’ heart sank more and more. He’d messed up so bad that Remus wouldn’t even pick up. 

The phone went to voicemail and he sighed, listening to Remus’ voice. The phone beeped and Sirius sighed, “Hey Remus it’s me. I’m sorry about earlier. I came after you but you’d already gone. And now you won’t even answer the phone. I guess what I’m trying to say is… I’m sorry I didn’t kiss you back. I messed up. I do want to kiss you. A lot. Sorry again. Call me back.” He hung up the phone and leant back against the wall. 

Why was this all so hard all the time? Why couldn’t they just get together and be done with it? They just had to have this whole big mess of kissing and running away and everything. It was so inconvenient. 

He sighed and walked back into the dorm room.

“What happened?”

“He didn’t pick up. I really messed up guys.” 

“Don’t worry about it Padfoot, you guys are gonna be fine.” 

“Yeah, I hope so.” Sirius sighed and collapsed on his bed, “I just need some time guys, can you give me the room for a bit?” 

They nodded and stood up to leave, “you best not be about to masturbate, dude.”

“Seriously Prongs?” Sirius rolled his eyes, “Now?”

“Sorry, I just had a thought and thought I’d let it fly free.” 

“Well don’t.” He fell back on his bed and listened to the door click shut. He groaned slowly and reached under his bed to pull out his guitar. He began to play slowly, his fingers moving on autopilot while his mind drifted to Remus, as it seemed to do a lot recently. He sighed as he thought about that kiss and how differently it would have gone if he could have just sorted out his damn brain and kissed him back. He couldn’t stop thinking about the feeling of them kissing and then things would actually work out well. As he allowed his mind to come back to the room he heard properly the song that he was playing. And then all he could feel was Remus lain out behind him and could hear him singing mixing in with the sound of his guitar.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *dramatic voiceover voice*  
> NEXT TIME ON SOMEBODY ELSE:
> 
> '"Just help me out.”'


	13. Remus Runs From Reality

Remus spent the week following the incident he described in his head as the-kiss-that-must-not-be-named, running away from his friends. He had never spent so little time in the common room as he did that week as he spent most of his time hanging around like a loner by the black lake. He was wildly glad that he only a couple of classes with the boys in which they sat separated from each other across the room so he managed to avoid them by distinctly not looking up from his workbook the entire time. He had also spent a great deal of time with Rhys and Joe which was potentially even more depressing than spending time alone because they were an infuriatingly cute couple, which was exactly the type of people you should not be around when you were heartbroken and hating yourself for screwing up your best 5 year friendship. But still, it was one of the easiest ways of avoiding the boys as Rhys agreed to break the rules and smuggle him into their own common room that they normally didn’t have access to which allowed him to spend at least 2 hours without looking over his shoulder constantly checking that they weren’t there. 

However, the evenings and nights proved a little more tricky. The strict curfew meant that Remus had to be back in his common room by 9 but the boys didn’t tend to go up to sleep until at least 10. That meant he had to figure out where to be in between 9 and the time the other boys had gone to sleep and he could sneak up to bed without them noticing (and sneak back out at obscene times in the morning). The methods he had tried were: hiding in the bathroom for 2 hours or hiding in the corner of the common room with his back to the room and keeping his head down and doing homework. He was yet to find a perfect solution to that part of his particular conundrum. It seemed that the system wasn’t made to allow a guy from hiding from his roommates for the foreseeable future. Remus personally, considered this a distinct flaw in the system. 

Another thing was very difficult was the voicemail Sirius left him that first day. He had deleted it without listening to it. That wasn’t something he could face.

There were moments, of course, that he considered if all of this sneaking round and loneliness was worth it. But then he thought about having to face Sirius again and seeing the inevitable rejection and revulsion in his eyes when he did and he couldn’t stand it. Somehow it was better staying in this eternal state of not quite knowing exactly what his reaction was. It was like that Shrodinger’s Cat thing that he’d learnt about from Big Bang Theory. 

It was all so fucking difficult. He hated not seeing the boys. The sneaking about was so difficult and draining and he wasn’t getting enough sleep. And he missed Sirius so goddamn much. He had tried so hard over the week to try and push him out of his head and just move on but that was extremely difficult when his every waking moment was devoted to avoiding him. There’s some points at which it is literally impossible to stop thinking about someone. It still killed him what had happened the day of the-kiss-that-must-not-be-named. But one of the worst things was that he couldn’t talk to anyone about it. Sure he probably could talk to Rhys, he was being absolutely great, but he just couldn’t deal with having to face up to as much as actually telling him what had happened. All Rhys knew was that something had happened between him and Sirius that had fucked everything up. Something about actually saying the words aloud and explicitly stating to someone else that he had been rejected that made it that bit too real. Come to think of it that might be one of the reasons why he couldn’t get over the other boy- he still wasn’t ready to let him go.

And that was an issue. If he was being honest with himself, he knew this couldn’t go on much longer. It wasn’t practical to try and avoid the guys he was living with and he missed them all a lot. And that meant that he would have to face up to Sirius and that meant getting over him so they could stay friends. 

So one particular Saturday when he was sat out on the lake side as far from the school building as possible with Rhys and Joe he looked up and took a deep breath before speaking, “I kissed Sirius.”

They frowned in confusion.

“Last week,” he clarified, “I kissed him after you guys had left the dorm and he didn’t kiss me back so I bolted.” 

“You mean you didn’t stay to hear what he had to say?”

“No, I knew it’d be bad so I just left. I couldn’t face it.”

“Well how do you know he was going to reject you?”

“He didn’t kiss me back Rhys I’m pretty sure that’s a clear indication.”

“Not necessarily. He could have just be surprised,” Joe said.

“Yeah, you need to talk to him about it.” Rhys nodded.

“Guys, I can’t do that. What I need to do is just get over him. Like you guys have been saying this whole time.”

“Yeah, but we didn’t know that there was still a chance that Sirius liked you ba-” 

“He doesn’t.” Remus cut across him. “Come on, I’m ready move on now, just help me out.” He was practically begging at this point. 

Rhys and Joe shared a look before replying, “Okay fine, you know Will Haversham?”

“Will Haversham in 6th year?”

“Yeah, he came up to me the other day to ask me if you were single.”

“He what?” Remus spluttered, “Will? In the year above? But he’s really hot.”

“Yeah,” Rhys laughed, “do you want me to give you his number?”

“I guess?” his mind was reeling as he sat there, dying a little bit as he thought over his options. It seemed a little bit quick to jump straight into going on a date with the hunky guy from the year above but what option did he have? If there was one surefire quick way to help him get over Sirius it was a hunk. “Yeah, okay, give it here.” 

“Awesome,” Rhys reached out for Remus’ phone, which he unlocked and opened the contacts before handing it over. Rhys put in the number and handed it back.

“Okay, should I text him?”

“Yes,” Joe laughed.

“Okay,” Remus nodded.

 

**4:34 19/4**

**Remus:** _Hey Will, It’s Remus, Rhys gave me your number, would you be interested in going out some time next weekend?_

Within a few seconds he’s received a reply.

**Will:** _Hi, yeah I’d love to, Friday night okay?_  
**Remus:** _Yeah, sounds great._

 

“Done, we’re going out on Friday.”

“Nice.”

“So are you gonna stop avoiding the guys yet?” 

He took a deep breath, “yeah.”

“Good, cause they’re over there.” 

Remus turned around to see Peter, James and Sirius stood at the base of a tree, looking over at them. 

“Shit, okay.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *dramatic voiceover voice*  
> NEXT TIME ON SOMEBODY ELSE:
> 
> '"I wouldn’t want to have my mistake mess things up.”'


	14. The Boy's Back, Brilliant

Sirius had been going slightly insane in the week that Remus was gone. He spent the first 2 days desperately trying to find and talk to Remus but the second night in he heard Remus come into the dorm late at night when they were all supposed to be sleeping. He had sat up quietly, grateful that he’d drawn his curtains that night. He listened to the quiet muffled sounds of Remus creeping around. He was trying so hard not to be heard. And it just struck Sirius at that moment that if he was trying that hard to not have to see him maybe he should just stop trying so hard to do something that Remus clearly didn’t want. 

And so he’d stopped trying so hard to talk to him and it hurt him quite a lot when he saw him keeping his head down in class and hiding in the corner of the common room in the evenings like that made him invisible. 

He had to admit that it had been a difficult week. He couldn’t help but keep thinking about Remus and that kiss even though he really needed to get both out of his head he really couldn’t. And he couldn’t help but imagine everything that could have happened if he had goddamn kissed him back.

On the Saturday after Remus had gone, the boys decided to go down by the lake. Sirius didn’t really play a great deal of attention as they walked and only looked up when James said his name.

“What?” 

“Remus is over there.”

“He’s what?” Sirius started.

“Turn around.”

Sirius turned around quickly. His eyes searched for a second before alighting on the only other group of people in the area. Rhys and Joe were sat close together and just in front of them, with his back to Sirius was Remus. Just as he looked over Rhys pointed directly at him and Remus turned around to look. 

Sirius’ heart skipped a beat as Remus stood up and started walking over slowly. It was happening, they were going to actually talk. He suddenly realised that he didn’t know what to do or what to say. He didn’t know if he needed to tell Remus how he felt or if that wasn’t what he wanted anymore. He had no clue. He wasn’t exactly versed in all of this. He decided that, instead of figuring out what he was supposed to say, because that was too much effort, he would just watch Remus walk. He walked slowly, not looking up, pulling the sleeves of his knitted sweater over his hands like he did when he was nervous. He looked so cute like that. He mentally chastised himself for his thoughts. 

“Hey.”

He shook himself from his thoughts and looked up into Remus’ face looking for anything he could read. “Hi, Remus I-“

“Can I go first?” Remus cut in.

He nodded, not trusting himself to speak.

“I’m sorry about what happened. It was out of line, I get that and it won’t happen again. You’re not interested-“ Sirius went to interrupt but Remus gave him a look that said ‘if you dare mess up my pre-prepared speech I will murder you’ and he closed his mouth, “You’re not interested and I get that and it’s okay. I actually have a date next week so you don’t have to worry about anything like that happening again. Again I’m sorry, I just really miss you guys and I wouldn’t want to have my mistake mess things up.” 

Sirius paused, his mind reeling. He thought he wasn’t interested. He had a date. He’d missed his chance. Dear God that hurt. But he had to brush all of that off now. For his friend. “Don’t worry about it. You know I don’t blame you for kissing me, I’m pretty fucking hot.” 

“You’re a jerk,”Remus laughed in response.

“So are we all good now?” James stepped forward from where he had been listening behind Sirius.

He looked over at Remus and they both smiled and nodded simultaneously. 

“Yeah, we’re good.” 

“Finally,” Peter sighed and sat down on the floor, “this whole week has been exhausting.”

“You can say that again,” Remus sighed and they all sat down with Peter. 

Sirius sat cross legged next to Remus deliberately keeping his distance a lot more than he used to. He couldn’t help but run over the speech he had just received in his head and suddenly, without warning he found himself speaking, “So you have a date?”

“Uhh, yeah,” Remus nodded and looked down.

“Who is it?”

“Uhh, Will, Will Haversham.”

“The Ravenclaw football captain from the year above?” James sat forward, “How did you do that?” 

“He asked Rhys if I was single and then he gave me his number and we set up a date.” 

“He asked about you?” James widened his eyes.

“Yeah, what’s so surprising about that?” Remus frowned.

“Well, you know, he’s older and… well he could have anyone he wants and he chose you.” 

“Yeah I was surprised too,” Remus chuckled quietly, “but he really seems interested.” 

“Good for you, where are you two going?” Sirius tried to seem casual even though his mind was going a little bit mental assessing Haversham’s every characteristic and his looks from memory even though he barely knew the guy. 

“I don’t know, I guess he’s gonna take me somewhere in town.” 

Sirius sighed and sat back against the trunk of the tree. He didn’t know what he was supposed to say, it seemed like they were dancing around the awkwardness of the situation, both of them trying to pretend it wasn’t there. 

But this is where they were at right now and maybe it would get better in a bit of time and they’d be just like normal. He was just waiting for that time. Just for now he had to listen to Remus talk about hot-as-fuck jock Will Haversham. It was probably really bad that he wanted the date to go badly.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *dramatic voiceover voice*  
> NEXT TIME ON SOMEBODY ELSE:
> 
> 'It was awfully embarrassing but it made Remus feel so good about himself that Will Haversham the heart-throb wanted him.'


	15. Fit-As-Fuck Footballer

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry I missed last week guys I was out of the country and if I'd thought about it I could have sorted so I still could have uploaded but I didn't think that far ahead. 
> 
> Sorry again, 
> 
> Hope you like this chapter anyway,
> 
> ~ i_ship_so_many_things <3

**10:32 20/4**

**Will:** _So I’ll pick you up from your common room at 7 on Friday? I was thinking we could go to The Three Broomsticks and have a few drinks_  
 **Remus:** _Yeah sounds great you do know I’m underage though right? They won’t give me alcohol…_  
 **Will:** _Yeah I know but I turned 18 in February I have ID so I can buy for you_  
 **Remus:** _Thanks sounds good to me just don’t get me too drunk and take advantage of me :p_  
 **Will:** _Hahahahah I would never do that, you’re too good for that_  
 **Remus:** _*blushes*_  
 **Will:** _It’s true!_  
 **Remus:** _You’re not so bad yourself :p_  
 **Will:** _Hahahahaha you flatter me_  
 **Remus:** _Hahaha I’m sure I’m not the only one_  
 **Will:** _The only one I care about <3 I don’t exactly care about the attentions of groups of simpering girls what with not being interested in them hahah_  
 **Remus:** _Yeah I get that :p not that I have groups of simpering girls but you know_  
 **Will:** _Yeah hahahah_  
 **Remus:** _Quick question… are you out yet?_  
 **Will:** _Not widely but I’m ready for that if that’s okay with you_  
 **Remus:** _Yeah I don’t care who knows anymore I’m not gonna hide another relationship_  
 **Will:** _Yeah Rhys mentioned that you two used to date_  
 **Remus:** _Yeah we did but only for a month or so_  
 **Will:** _So there’s definitely nothing between you guys anymore…?_  
 **Remus:** _No of course not nothing to worry about :p besides have you seen Rhys and Joe lately!?_  
 **Will:** _Hahahahah yeah they can barely keep their hands off each other in the common room_  
 **Remus:** _Exactly_  
 **Will:** _Yeah I must admit I get very jealous of those guys very often_  
 **Remus:** _Hahahahah same_

 

They texted like that all week leading up to their date sharing all sorts of information and random conversations. Remus was pleasantly surprised by how easy he found Will to get along with and he had little issue finding things to talk about and somehow feeling comfortable around the older guy. 

He’d caught sight of Will a couple of times over the week around the building and grounds, in between class and after and each time they noticed each other Will would beam this wide glistening smile that Remus knew made all of the girls in the school (and himself) weak at the knees and all Remus could do in response was smile back weakly and blush before looking down at the floor and hurrying on his way. It was awfully embarrassing but it made Remus feel so good about himself that Will Haversham the heart-throb wanted him. 

And above all, Will was an amazing distraction from Sirius. It seemed that every time Remus started thinking about Sirius and his heart started aching he was greeted with a flirty text from Will or he ran into him in the halls. Will was fulfilling his exact function in this situation and maybe starting to be a little bit more as the week progressed and Remus learned more about him and started to like the idea of him quite a lot. 

 

So when the day of their first date came around he was a little nervous.

Remus looked at his reflection in the mirror and frowned. He walked out of the bathroom into the common room. “Guys are you sure I look okay?”

“You look great Moony quit stressing.” Sirius batted his hand at him like it was nothing. 

“Okay,” he nodded and pulled his shirt down one last time. 

“Besides you’re just going to The Three Broomsticks, it’s not exactly mega fancy,” said Peter.

“Yeah,” he nodded again, “you know I’ve always thought The Three Broomsticks was a bit of a weird name for a pub.”

His friends frowned at him like he was speaking a different language.

“What?” he frowned self consciously, “You mean you don’t think I should open with that one?”

“Definitely not.” 

“Fine.” His phone buzzed in his pocket and he puled it out. The display was lit up with a message from Will.

 

**6:59 25/4**

**Will:** _Your carriage awaits._

 

“He’s here, I better go.” He started to walk towards the door that led out into the hallway. 

“Good luck!” He heard his friends calling out after him and laughed to himself.

He stepped through the door and was greeted by a beaming Will. Will was several inches taller than Remus and broader. He had sandy blonde hair that was swept away from his face to reveal is dark drown eyes. His jaw was covered in a generous amount of stubble that was reasonably close to being an actual beard. He was very attractive. He had a reputation at the school for being so. The fit-as-fuck captain of the Ravenclaw football team that girls swooned for even though he never dated them and now Remus knew why. 

He couldn’t help but feel a little overwhelmed that he was in the presence of the guy let alone going on a date with him. James hadn’t exactly helped the other day either when Remus had told him, acting like Remus had absolutely no shot with a guy like Will. Which he most certainly didn’t except here he was standing outside the door to the Gryffindor common room face to shoulder with Will Haversham. 

“Hey.” Oh and his voice was deep. 

“Hi.” Remus replied quietly, his nerves undoubtedly flowing off of him in waves that were undoubtedly desperately unattractive. 

“So we don’t actually have a carriage,” Will explained, “I thought we’d walk into town and then we’d get a taxi on our way back. Sound good?”

“Yeah sounds great.” Remus nodded eagerly and followed Will as he turned and walked down the corridor towards the staircase that would take them down the main entrance. 

Remus’ mind was screaming internally: _This hot guy like you REPEAT THIS HOT GUY LIKES YOU_

But there was this little niggling part of him that was still thinking: _Yeah, but Will Haversham is no Sirius Black._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *dramatic voiceover voice*  
> NEXT TIME ON SOMEBODY ELSE:
> 
> '“But he gave you alcohol and then shoved his tongue down your throat.”'


	16. KISSING KILLS YOU KNOW

“What do you think they’re doing?” Sirius lay on his bed looking up at the canopy above him.

“We don’t know, Padfoot,” Peter sighed from his bed across the room, “they could be doing anything.”

“You need to stop thinking about him man,” said James.

“I can’t just stop thinking about him,” Sirius got up off his bed to walk over to stand between his friends’ beds, “he’s out on a date with the biggest catch in the whole school.”

“We know, but you’ve gotta stop thinking about him or you’ll drive yourself mad.”

“I can’t,” Sirius whined, clinging onto one of the posts on James’ bed.

At that moment he heard the door to the dorm room open behind him and he span around quickly, “Remus! You’re back.”

“Uhh, yeah,” Remus seemed taken aback to see the three of them waiting for him, “you didn’t need to wait up for me you know, it’s late.”

“We just wanted to see how your first date went,” Sirius jumped in eagerly. He found himself willing Remus’ face to fall and for him to say that it went awfully so that Sirius could wrap his arms around the other boy and comfort him and tell him not to worry and that they could be together if that was still something Remus wanted.

But that didn’t happen.

“It was great,” Remus grinned, “he’s super sweet and we had a really good time.”

“Good,” James cut in before Sirius had a chance to respond and mess everything up, “We’re glad you had fun.”

“Yeah.” Peter nodded and moved to lie down and go to sleep. 

Sirius began to instantly flounder. He didn’t want the conversation to end there. He wanted to know everything, he wanted to know exactly what he was competing with and losing to. He came up with the only solution he could think of and blurted it out, “Let’s play truth or dare.”

“Sirius it’s almost midnight piss off,” James grumbled.

“Oh come on,” Sirius shot James a pleading look, “we’ve done it before and it’s Saturday tomorrow.” 

“Fine.” James agreed reluctantly and Sirius grinned sitting down suddenly on James’ bed. 

Peter groaned and grumbled but sat back up in bed and Remus sat, curled up on the other end of his bed without complaint. 

“Okay then, who’s starting?” James settled into his role as game master as we always did.

“I’ll go,” Remus smiled, “Truth.”

“Okay,” James sat back, clearly thinking. Sirius gave him look that he hoped was saying _‘please ask about the date please ask about the date’_. James rolled his eyes and sighed, “What was the best part of your date?” 

Sirius let out a silent thanks as Remus laughed.

“Uhh, he’s a pretty good kisser.”

“You kissed him?” Sirius couldn’t stop his immediate reaction, “on your first date?”

“Yeah,” Remus said defensively, “I wasn’t planning to but we’d drunk a little and he’s really hot.”

“He got you drunk?” Sirius responded immediately.

“No, I’m just tipsy,” Remus waved him off.

“But he gave you alcohol and then shoved his tongue down your throat.” Sirius continued protesting without thinking through what he was saying and what the consequences of his words would be. All he could think was that he didn’t want that dip-shit Haversham taking advantage of his Remus. And that was all it was. He wasn’t jealous. He was over Remus it was all fine. 

“Sirius, he did not shove his tongue down my throat. Don’t make it sound so crude,” Remus stood up, “Besides it’s none of your business what I did on my date and if he kissed me or not and for your information **I** kissed **HIM** first. He was **NOT** taking advantage of me.”

“Moony I’m sorry I jus-“

“Whatever Sirius it doesn’t matter. I don’t need to know what you think about the guy I’m dating.” Remus turned away from them and stormed off to his own bed drawing the curtains around him. 

“Sirius what the fuck is wrong with you?” James hissed quietly.

“What?” Sirius hissed back, “I just want to make sure he’s okay.”

“Yeah well you sound like a physco ex.”

“I don’t know what I’m doing, I’m trying to be normal but I want to make sure he’s okay.”

“You said that already.”

“I don’t know James, I’m messed up, I don’t know what’s going on in my head anymore.”

“Well you need to get your act together or you’re gonna lose him as a friend. By the sounds of things Will is not going away anytime soon so you need to get used to him,” James pointed out, along with gesturing to the closed curtains of Remus’ bed on his left hand side drawing attention to the muffled laughter of the boy who was undoubtedly texting his date, “you need to get it together if you don’t want to lose him.”

“I guess you’re right.” Sirius sighed and lay down on James’ bed looking over at Remus’ drawn curtains, “I just don’t know what to do.”

“You have to be his friend,” James said, “Even if it’s hard with him and Will sometimes, you have to be his friend and that means not pestering him with questions and judging what he does. You have to let him come to you and tell you what he’s comfortable with.”

“Okay.” Sirius nodded and sat up. “I should go and apologise, shouldn’t I?”

“Yeah.” James laughed and Sirius stood up off the bed. He walked around to the other side of Remus’ bed. He stood there for a second, looking at the curtain and listening to the muffled sounds of Remus moving and the occasional quiet burst of laughter. He took a deep breath and knocked on the post nearest to him. 

“Can I come in?”

“Okay.”

Sirius pushed the curtain aside and climbed onto the bed, closing the curtain behind him. Remus was on the other side of the bed, his phone discarded in his lap.

“I’m sorry that I was such a dick about Will.”

“Don’t worry about it,” Remus sighed, “I get it, it’s a bit weird.”

“No, no, it’s not that,” Sirius answered hurriedly, “I really do just want to make sure you’re okay and that you’re happy. And he’s older and so popular and he’s the captain of the Ravenclaw football team and I just didn’t want him to hurt you.”

“He wouldn’t do that,” Remus answered reassuringly, “he really is a nice guy. You don’t need to worry about me. I’m okay. And I think that he could make me happy.”

“Yeah?”

“Yeah.” He paused, “He just asked me if I’d be his boyfriend.”

“Really?” Sirius’ heart sank but he pushed it aside, “What did you say?”

“I said yes.”

“Good,” he muttered, “good that’s good.”

“Yeah.”

“Are you keeping it a secret or are you telling people?”

“We’re not gonna be hiding.”

“I’m glad, but if you get any shit from anyone for it you tell me and they are dead.”

Remus laughed, “Okay,”

They sat there for a second, not speaking and Sirius could feel his heart getting heavier as he thought about what Remus had said. It really seemed that Remus was over him. He was with Will and Sirius had missed his shot. 

He sighed as he watched Remus responding to a text. He really was so gorgeous when he smiled like that and his eyes lit up. But they were lighting up for Will and not for him.

“Well,” Sirius pulled himself out of his thoughts, “I best go to sleep, I’m getting a little tired now.”

“Yeah of course.” Remus nodded.

Sirius pushed the curtain aside so he could get out. 

“Wait,” Remus called him back before he could leave for his own bed, “thank you.” 

Sirius smiled slightly and nodded before climbing off the bed and closing Remus’ curtain again. He climbed into his own bed, half closing his own curtains. He fell back so his head hit the pillow and sighed. This was all going to be so hard.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *dramatic voiceover voice*  
> NEXT TIME ON SOMEBODY ELSE:
> 
> '“I’m not trying to steal your man I promise.”'


	17. All Public People are Petrified

“Remind me why we’re going to the football match. Gryffindor aren’t even playing.” Peter sighed as the four boys made their way down to the football pitch.

“Yes but Ravenclaw is.” James laughed and poked Remus in his side.

“He invited me to watch him play and he reserved the four of us seats in the front row. Best seats apparently.” Remus blushed.

“Hey!” 

Remus looked over and smiled as he saw Will walking over to them. Remus sighed at the sight of Will in his football uniform. He really was very attractive. 

“Hey there,” he walked ahead of his friends so that he reached his boyfriend before them and could reach up to kiss him quickly, fighting the instinct to look around to see if anyone was looking, “You ready for the game?” 

“Yeah, I’ve got a really good team,” Will nodded and he turned and started walking back the way he’d come towards the pitch. “I’m really excited that you’re here.”

“I’m excited too.” Remus looked up at his boyfriend and smiled. 

They walked silently side by side, their hands brushing occasionally. Every time their fingers touched Remus looked up at the other boy and smiled.

They reached the pitch and Will took them through to their seats in the stands that he’d set aside and marked with his own self-made reserved signs. Remus stood in front of his seat as the others sat down and he found himself stood incredibly close to Will. 

“Well, good luck.” Remus smiled up at his boyfriend. 

“Thanks.” Will grinned and pressed a kiss to Remus’ lips. He turned and jumped the barrier onto the pitch. “I’ll see you at the end of the game.”

“Bye!” Remus called after him as he started jogging across the pitch towards his team mates by the goal. 

“These seats are great Moony,” James sighed, sitting back in his seat, kicking his feet up onto the barrier, “You should keep him, he comes with perks.”

Remus rolled his eyes as he took his seat, “Glad you’re enjoying yourself James.”

He looked out on the pitch as he sat and watched as his boyfriend brought his team around him in a huddle of some such. Remus did exactly understand all of this sports stuff, it wasn’t exactly his thing as much as James had tried to explain it to him in the past he couldn’t get his head around it. 

It wasn’t long before the game had kicked off and Remus watched quietly, trying to follow what was going on but mostly just watching as they ran up and down the pitch. 

“He really is very good isn’t he?” Sirius leaned over to whisper in Remus’ ear.

Remus almost shivered at the feeling of Sirius’ breath on his neck but stopped himself. He was’ allowed to feel like that, “Yeah, we already knew that, he’s the Ravenclaw captain.” 

“He’s pretty hot as well.”

“He’s what now?” Remus turned to him, surprised.

“Sorry,” Sirius laughed, “I’m not trying to steal your man I promise. I guess I just like a man in uniform.”

Remus nodded slowly, trying not to be thrown off. Was Sirius saying what he thought he was saying? He tried to be as normal as he could, “You learn something new every day.”

“Yeah I guess you do.” Sirius nodded. 

Remus spent the game trying desperately not to look over at Sirius and have his mind running over Sirius’ comment. Was he trying to tell him something or was it just a throw away comment?

He shook himself from his thoughts with the sound of the half of the stadium roaring and Remus looked up to see that his boyfriend had scored a goal. He couldn’t be thinking about Sirius right then when he had a boyfriend that was just there on the pitch running around and winning football games. He was meant to be thinking about and obsessing over him instead. 

The game passed by with Remus paying rigid attention the pitch and following Will with his eyes as he moved. The game ended as the coach blew a whistle and the stands around Remus started cheering. 

“Did he win?” Remus turned to Sirius and James.

“Yeah, you idiot he won,” James laughed. 

Remus grinned and turned back to watch his boyfriend. After a few seconds of watching Will celebrating with his team mates the boy came running across the pitch directly towards Remus.

Remus smiled when Will reached him, leaning over the barrier to talk to him, "so you won then."

Will laughed, "yeah we did."

"Well done." 

"Thanks," Will smiled and rubbed his neck awkwardly, "so do I get a kiss as a reward?"

Remus swore he could hear Sirius scoff beside him but he ignored him and laughed, leaning forward to kiss his boyfriend. Will caught hold of Remus' neck and guided him downwards so they could deepen the kiss.

When Remus pulled away he became acutely aware of everyone around them staring at them. He looked around at them awkwardly and wished immediately to be swallowed up by the ground. 

He knew that they'd talked about it being a public relationship and that he was okay with that but it didn't stop the reality of it from being immediately terrifying. He'd never thought about what being public would mean especially when a popular guy like Will was involved. It really meant that everyone knew. Shit that was scary.

"You okay?" Remus turned to his side to see Sirius was now stood up next to him.

"Uhh yeah I'm fine." 

Apparently Remus was entirely unconvincing when he said this because Sirius responded by apparently reading his mind. 

"Don't worry about them and what they think about you. If you're happy then they can fuck off because something that makes you happy is none of their business."

Remus nodded slowly and smiled weakly. 

"I'm sorry if I pushed it too far," Will reached out and ran his arm down Remus' arm comfortingly.

"No, no, you didn’t, its fine." Remus assured himself as much as he did Will and Sirius, "we talked about this and what I said stands. I'm not gonna hide anymore."

Remus nodded again more decisively and moved to hold Will's hand. "Congratulations on winning the match." And then he leant down again to kiss him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *dramatic voiceover voice*  
> NEXT TIME ON SOMEBODY ELSE:
> 
> '“THEY’RE NOT THAT GOOD TOGETHER HE SHOULD BE WITH ME!"'


	18. Forget Fucked Up Feelings

It seemed that by the day after the match everyone in the entire school knew about Will and Remus and they would not shut up about it.

Sirius was getting fed up of overhearing conversations between groups of first year girls about how they were 'such a cute couple' and that they were 'goals'. 

And it wasn't just the gossipy younger years that were abuzz, both Remus and Will's years were talking about it non stop about whether or not they'd 'called' the two boys as gay or not. 

Sirius was so close to just punching the next person in the nose who came up to him asking about Remus and what it was like sleeping in the same room as a gay guy and whether or not Will really was dating him. 

He just wanted to shout at the top of his lungs _“THEY’RE NOT THAT GOOD TOGETHER HE SHOULD BE WITH ME!"_

But of course he didn't do that because he would have looked insane. 

So he just had to put up with the incessant gossip and watch Will holding Remus' hand or kissing him because Will then started hanging around with them.

He thought he could deal with it the first time it happened. Will had come over to sit with them over at their usual spot under the tree near the lake and he had sat down next to Remus and kept reasonably quiet and hadn’t talked a lot. It was reasonably easy to pretend that he wasn’t there and that everything was normal. 

But then the next time he sat with them he was more chatty and sat closer to Remus so that they’re sides were pressed together. They kissed hello and goodbye and it made Sirius’ heart skip a beat every time because it hurt more than he cared to admit. Probably because it constantly called him back to the feeling of Remus’ lips on his and the fact that he could have had everything that Will currently had if he hadn’t been an idiot and now he was forced to sit and watch while Will had the opportunity to touch Remus however he wanted and kiss him whenever he wanted and Sirius had to be fine with it. It goddamn fucking hurt. 

One time the following week Remus even decided to sneak Will into the Gryffindor common room and bring him up to their dorm to spend time with the group. Sirius was glad that the rest of them were going to be there and not just Remus alone with the guy but it stung a shit tonne when Lily noticed Will as they were going upstairs and confronted them about what he was doing there.

Remus responded, “I’m spending time with my boyfriend, problem?” 

And he just seemed so giggly and happy when Lily let them go without turning them in and Remus pulled Will up the stairs behind him and kissed him roughly before basically sitting in Will’s lap the entire afternoon. 

There was no way that Sirius could pretend that he wasn’t just hurting. As much as he wanted Remus to be happy, and he clearly was, he really just wanted Remus to be happy with **him** and not Will. 

At one point during the evening when Will was getting particularly hands-y Sirius made some excuse to the group about needing the toilet and left the room in a hurry. He stood in the bathroom as he had done a month ago except now no part of him was confused about what he wanted. His whole mind and body was crying out for Remus Remus and only Remus. 

But there was nothing he could do about that. Remus was happy with Will and Sirius had to get over his feelings. 

_Jesus christ this is gonna be hard_

Sirius collected himself and headed back towards the dormitory, bracing himself the whole way for what he would be faced with when he got back. 

He braced himself against the door before pushing it open and looking around, noticing quickly that Remus no longer had an older boy wrapped around him. 

“Where’s Will?”

“He had to go so he wouldn’t miss curfew,” Remus sighed.

“Well, there’s a chess tournament going on in the common room, you guys coming?” James stood up and headed towards the door.

Peter nodded and stood up to follow him. 

“I think I’ll stay here.” Sirius muttered, and went to move towards his bed before he felt James catch his arm.

“Dude,” James whispered, “Are you okay?”

“Yeah I’m fine.” Sirius brushed him off.

“It’s just with Will and Remus and everything,” James spoke so quietly Sirius could barely hear him. 

Sirius looked over James’ shoulder to look at Remus who was watching them, looking confused, “I said I’m fine.” 

“Okay.” James nodded, “Remus, you coming with?”

“Uhh no I think I’ll stay here, keep Sirius company.”

“You don’t have to do that Moony,” Sirius responded quickly, “I’m not gonna be much fun just go and watch the tournament.”

“No I’m good honestly.” Remus sat down on the edge of his bed, “You guys go.”

“Okay,” James nodded and they left the dormitory. 

“Remus I’m honestly not in the mood for a chat,” Sirius crossed the room and fell face first onto his bed.

“What was that just now with James?” 

Sirius felt the bed dip next to him. 

“It was nothing,” Sirius spoke into his pillow, “Don’t worry about it.”

“I just want to make sure you’re okay Pads.”

Sirius felt a hand fall on his back and his heart skipped. 

“Look,” Sirius turned over and sat up, “I’ll tell you exactly what I told James, I’m fine.”

“Pads, I know you and I don’t believe you.” Remus nudged Sirius in the side and he sighed before moving over so they could sit side by side. 

Sirius looked over at Remus. He sighed heavily as he looked at him. He couldn’t lie to Remus. He knew that. It was absolutely hopeless.

“I’ve just been having a tough time this past week or so.” Sirius answered the question without really giving his friend any real information. 

“Then talk to me.” Remus turned so Sirius was forced to look at him directly, “You’ve barely talked to me for ages.”

“You know. I don’t like talking about feelings.” Sirius looked down.

“That’s not true though is it,” Remus replied, “I think you like talking about how you feel but you say you don’t because you think it’s going to ruin your reputation as the bad boy.” 

_Damn._

_How did he know that?_

“You know what Remus, you need to back up a bit,” Sirius slid off the bed, “You think you know me so well but you don’t.” 

Sirius mind went reeling as he kept rambling on. He didn’t know what he was doing. All he knew was that if he pushed Remus away he could stop having all of these issues. 

“Sirius what are you doing?” Remus stood up.

“What do you mean what am I doing?” Sirius stormed away to the other side of the room, “I’m asking you to stop trying to interfere in my life.”

“Sirius.”

Sirius heard Remus walk up behind him.

“Why are you saying all this?”

Sirius couldn’t take it anymore. He felt like everything inside him was boiling up and he couldn’t hold anything in anymore. 

He spun on his heels to look Remus in the eye as he spoke “BECAUSE I LIKE YOU.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *dramatic voiceover voice*  
> NEXT TIME ON SOMEBODY ELSE:
> 
> '“Tell me the truth.”'


	19. What! Where! When!... Wailingggg!

“You what?” Remus took a step back. 

“I like you Remus,” Sirius repeated, “That’s why I’ve been pushing you away or whatever this is, okay? You happy now?”

“What do you mean you like me?” Remus stepped back again.

“I mean I can’t stop thinking about you and I wish that I’d gotten my act together and kissed you back when you kissed me because now I’ve missed my chance to be with you and so I have to sit and watch Will be literally all over you,” Sirius sat down heavily on Peter’s bed.

“Oh.” Remus sat down carefully beside him. “But you’re straight.”

“Yeah, turns out I’m not.” Sirius laughed awkwardly. “Sorry.”

Remus sighed heavily. “So you liked me when I kissed you.”

Sirius nodded. 

_So if I hadn’t run away we could have been together._

“Shit.”

Remus stood up again and turned around to face Sirius, “I’m with Will.”

“Yeah I’m aware,” Sirius said bitterly. 

“I really like Will.” Remus said instinctively.

“Yeah I know,” Sirius nodded and stood up, “I’m not trying to get between you. I didn’t mean to say anything it just slipped out. I can’t keep secrets from you.”

“So I was right, I do know you the best.” Remus smiled slowly.

“Of course you do.” Sirius smiled back.

They both fell silent, looking at each other carefully.

Remus sighed. He couldn’t help but feel so fucking stupid. Sirius had liked him all that time when he’d been hiding away, convincing himself he hated him. 

“This won’t change anything between us, right?” Sirius looked worried, “you’ll stay with Will and I’ll get over you and get a boyfriend and we’ll be fine.”

“Yeah of course.” Remus nodded quickly. “We’ll be fine.” 

“Okay.”

 

Remus tried his best over the next few days to be normal but it was really hard. He couldn’t help but think constantly about what would have happened if Sirius had kissed back or if he hadn’t run away. But that was all normal, he convinced himself. It was normal to think about that even though he was with Will. It didn’t mean he still liked Sirius because he didn’t. 

He didn’t want to hurt Sirius and it was killing him that Sirius was hurting because of him and Will. And so Remus made excuses every time Will asked about hanging out with his friends. 

It wasn’t long before Will noticed something was up.

“Why haven’t we hung out with your friends since that day you snuck me into your dorm?” Will asked the following Wednesday when they were walking around the grounds at lunch. 

“What are you on about?” Remus laughed nervously. It wasn’t that he hadn’t told Will about what had happened with Sirius it was just that… yeah, no that was it. 

_It would just be a whole big mess because I’d have to tell him about the kiss and fancying Sirius for almost 2 years and then it’d end up with him thinking that he’s just a rebound or a distraction._

_But isn’t that exactly what he is?_

Remus chastised himself mentally. He couldn’t think like that. It wasn’t fair on Will. He really cared about Will. He did. Them being together had nothing to do with the kiss. 

“I think I was clear the first time,” Will laughed quietly, “What’s going on?”

“Nothing.” Remus replied hurriedly. 

“‘Cause if I didn’t know any better I’d say you were ashamed of me or something.”

“That’s ridiculous,” Remus stopped walking and turned to look up at his boyfriend, “I’m not ashamed of you.”

“Okay.” Will nodded. 

Remus nodded and held back a sigh of relief. He was off the hook for now.

“Oh hey Sirius!”

Remus’ eyes widened and he spun on his heels to see where Will was looking to see Sirius walking alone by the edge of the lake. He turned to see them and waved slightly.

“Come on over!” Will called out.

“Will I don’t think that’s a g-“

“Why not Remus?” Will turned to him sharply, “Why shouldn’t I talk to your best friend?”

“No I’m not saying that.” Remus stammered out hurriedly. 

“I think that’s exactly what you’re sayi- Hi!” Will smiled as Sirius reached them and gave them a quizzical look. 

“Hey…”

“Hi.” Remus spoke quietly not daring to look up at either of the men that were now surrounding him. He couldn’t quite face either of their questioning faces.

_Dear lord this is difficult._

“What’s going on?” Sirius spoke slowly.

“Remus?”

“Huh?” Remus looked up at Will who seemed to be staring him down. “Oh nothing much we’re good.” He nodded slowly looking over at Sirius attempting to apologise with his eyes for the awkward situation they had brought him into. 

“Yeah.” Will nodded and Remus looked up at him to see him watching the silent exchange between him and Sirius with narrowed eyes. 

The silence was painful.

“Well we best be going.” Will smiled and took hold of Remus’ hand, “Good to see you Sirius.”

“Yeah.” Sirius nodded slowly, obviously confused.

Will started to walk away and Remus walked after him, still connected at the hands but as he walked he turned to look at Sirius who gave him this look of “dude what the fuck was that?” 

Remus mouthed ’sorry’ to him before turning around to see Will watching him. 

“It’s him isn’t it.”

“What’s him?”

“He’s the reason I haven’t spent any time with your friends. Isn’t he?” Will stopped walking and pulled Remus to a stop beside him.

“I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

“Remus, cut the crap.”

Remus took a step back. 

_Shit, this is new._

“You’re looking at each other like mournful puppies.”

Remus didn’t know what to say.

“Does he like you?”

“Sirius?” Remus laughed slowly, trying to pass it off as if the idea was ludicrous and that he hadn’t had his best friend confessing his feelings for him 3 days before hand. 

He looked up at Will and his face said everything Remus needed to know- Will didn’t believe him for a second. “Yeah.”

“Yeah.” Will nodded slowly. He paused, “And you like him.”

“I’m with you.” Remus answered quickly.

“That’s not an answer.” Will sighed heavily. “Tell me the truth.” 

Remus began floundering even worse than before. He looked up at Will and knew that the only thing he could do was tell the truth.

“I used to.”

Will closed his eyes as if he was tired, “For how long? Until when?”

Remus put his hands to his head, “Will, I don’t know what to s-“

“Just tell me the truth Remus please.”

Remus sighed and told Will everything. He told him about liking Sirius for almost 2 years and the kiss and running away and then getting together with Will.

“So I was a rebound.” Will spoke slowly.

Remus nodded carefully. 

“And if you weren’t with me you’d be with him?”

Remus closed his eyes, “I don’t know.”

He looked up to see Will nodding slowly. 

“Okay,” Will paused, “I think you should be with him.”

“What?” 

“You liked him for so long. You should get your shot.” Will smiled sadly. 

“I’m so sorry.” Remus spoke quietly. 

“It’s okay.” Will opened his arms and Remus walked into them without another sound. He leant into Will and sighed heavily. 

“I’m sorry.”

“Don’t be sorry.” Will pulled back and smiled again, “I hope it works out for you two.”

He walked away, leaving Remus stood alone, throughly confused and slightly lost.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *dramatic voiceover voice*  
> NEXT TIME ON SOMEBODY ELSE:
> 
> '“I’m sorry I kissed you.”'


	20. Surviving Sitting in Silence

Sirius sighed heavily as he sat down by the edge of the lake.

_What the fuck was that conversation?_

Sirius didn’t even know if he could count that awkward encounter as a conversation. He was certainly glad to not have to stand in the middle of what seems like a wildly odd argument between the guy he liked and his boyfriend. 

He sighed again and lay back in the grass to look up at the sky. It wasn’t that he wasn’t trying to get over Remus but it was just so hard. It was so hard sleeping in the same room as him and constantly hearing him breathing.

_God that sounds creepy._

He had no idea how Remus had spent almost 2 years having a crush on him and being constantly around him. 

“Hey.”

Sirius rolled onto his side to see Remus sat beside him on the bank of the river.

“Hi.” Sirius rolled back onto his back and closed his eyes, not quite sure he could face looking at his best friend without losing his mind. “What was that just now?”

“Uhh, Will found out about everything that’s happened between us.” Remus spoke slowly, pausing between words as if he was deciding whether or not he should say them as he went along. 

“Oh.” Sirius fought to keep his eyes closed and looking and feeling indifferent. Will and Remus weren’t any of his business, “What happened?”

Remus paused for what felt like an age, “He said that he thinks I should be with you.”

“He what?” Sirius sat up quickly and looked over at his friend. 

“He broke up with me,” Remus spoke quietly looking over at him, “Well he more kind of let me fly free or something like that I don’t know.” 

“Oh.” Sirius looked over at him. Remus looked tired and like he was being dragged down by his life and the things on his shoulders. All Sirius wanted to do was pull him into his arms and hold him and keep him safe from his thoughts. He couldn’t do that though. “Are you okay?”

“I think so.” Remus nodded slowly, looking out across the water of the lake. 

“What are you gonna do now?” 

“I don’t know.” Remus laughed quietly.

They both sighed almost simultaneously and Sirius lay back down on the grass reaching out for Remus’ hand and pulling him down too. They lay side by side, holding hands and looking up at the sky for what felt like a thousand years. 

All Sirius could feel in that time was the feeling of Remus’ hand in his and all of the points at which their arms were connected. He didn’t know how he was feeling or what he wanted to happen or expected to happen as he held Remus’ hand. All he knew was that he didn’t want to stop feeling connected to him. 

“This is all so fucked.” Remus sighed, breaking the quiet

“What is?” Sirius turned his head to look at his friend.

“Everything that happened between us.” Remus turned to look at him too.

Sirius frowned, “A bit.” 

There was a pause.

“I’m sorry I kissed you.”

“I’m sorry I didn’t kiss you.”

Sirius couldn’t help but stare at Remus as they we’re laid so shamelessly close together.

“Do you wanna try it again?” Sirius spoke quietly.

“Try what again?” Remus said.

“Me kissing you.” 

“Sirius,” Remus rolled away, still holding onto Sirius hand, “I don’t know. It’s so messy.” 

“That’s why I want us to start again.” Sirius sighed. “And I think that it could be more messy if we didn’t. Being friends after all of this seems a little crazy doesn’t it?”

“But a relationship seems crazy too.” Remus rubbed his face with his hand. 

“A little.” Sirius nodded. “But I don’t care anymore.” Sirius dropped Remus’ hand and sat up on his side looking down at Remus. “I don’t care if it’s crazy, I like you and I wanna kiss you, isn’t that enough?”

“I don’t know,” Remus looked up at Sirius and sighed, “We’re not kids, we can’t just rush into things.”

“Moony, that’s where you’re wrong,” Sirius laughed quietly, “We **are** young. If we wanna do it why shouldn’t we?”

Remus was silent and Sirius began to mentally curse himself for assuming that Remus wanted what he did.

“God, I love it when you get all passionate like that.” Remus pulled Sirius down as he leant up and their lips clashed together. 

Sirius sighed and shifted so he was holding himself above Remus with his hands on either side of Remus’ head. He was not going to make the same mistake as last time. He felt Remus’ hand curl in his hair and he groaned softly. 

It was even better than the last time and even better than he had imagined. Remus tasted of the outside air and chocolate and it made Sirius feel like he was flying over the lake. It was nothing like he had ever felt before with anyone else and he knew in that moment without question that this was what he wanted and this was who he was.

He sat back on his heels and Remus followed him up, refusing to break the kiss and Sirius smiled against his lips. 

“Dear God this is good.” Remus sighed and pushed Sirius down to lie on his back and swung a leg over him so that he was knelt, straddling his waist.

Sirius sat up to kiss him, not wanting to wait for Remus to come down to meet him. 

This was so different to anything Sirius had experienced before. All he was able to think about was the feeling of Remus all over him and the feeling of Remus’ soft lips on his and his rough hands in his hair and on his neck. It wasn’t anything like with Ellie where Sirius was thinking about anything else possible. Everything was just Remus Remus Remus. 

Sirius pulled away from the kiss reluctantly and slowly. They both breathed heavily looking at each other carefully, neither of them quite knowing what to say. 

Sirius took hold of Remus’ hand and they sat quietly for a second before Remus shifted to the side and off of Sirius’ lap. 

They sat beside each other holding hands and looking out at the lake again. 

“Wow we’re cute.” Remus laughed quietly.

“Shut up, you’re ruining my reputation.” Sirius rolled his eyes.

“If you’re so worried about you reputation why don’t you stop holding my hand.” Remus laughed again.

“Piss off, you don’t own me.” Sirius said. 

He didn’t let go of Remus’ hand.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *dramatic voiceover voice*  
> NEXT TIME ON SOMEBODY ELSE:
> 
> '“Seriously?”'


	21. Cuteness Comes in Couples (or Maybe Thruples?)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey guys!
> 
> I'm putting the final chapter up a bit earlier because I'm not gonna be at home tomorrow morning and I don't think any of you are going to complain at getting the ending early c:
> 
> Enjoy
> 
> ~ i_ship_too_many_things <3

“So, where are we at then?” Remus held up his and Sirius clasped hands as they walked back towards the school building. 

“Well I don’t know,” Remus could feel Sirius’s fingers running over the back of his hand, “you wanna be my boyfriend?”

“How romantic,” Remus laughed, “but yeah sure.”

“So how are we gonna tell the guys?”

“I’m sure it won’t be an issue,” Sirius smiled, “They already know I’m crazy for you and that I was your mystery man so I’m sure they’ll catch on.”

Remus laughed.

“Are you two holding hands?”

The pair turned around as they heard James call out behind them.

“Yeah, I think they got it.”

“So you two finally got together huh?” James slung his arm over Sirius’ shoulder as he and Peter reached them.

Remus blushed as Sirius grinned widely.

“I knew it.” James patted Sirius on the shoulder.

“So you’re saying that Moony’s had 2 boyfriend in the past 2 weeks?” Peter sighed, “Not fair.”

“You should have told me you wanted a boyfriend Wormy,” Remus laughed, “I know people, I can hook you up.”

“That’s not what I meant.” Peter said, flustered.

“Are you sure?” Sirius joined in, “Word on the street is that Will Haversham is recently single.” 

“Guysss,” Peter whined.

“Don’t worry Pete,” James laughed, “We know you’re not gay.”

“Yeah it’s extremely statistically unlikely that all 4 of us would be gay.” Sirius giggled to himself. 

“Hey.” James jabbed Sirius in the side making Sirius jump sideways into Remus. 

“Just because we’re dating doesn’t mean you can literally jump on top of me.” Remus frowned.

“You weren’t saying that earlier.” Sirius muttered. 

“I’m not sure if it’s slipped your mind but I believe, I was the one who jumped on you.” Remus had almost forgotten the others were there as he flirted shamelessly with Sirius. It still felt crazy that he could do that and have Sirius flirt back. 

“Guys, we’re happy for you but stop.” James said and he continued walking up towards the school building. 

Sirius and Remus walked behind their friends and Remus sighed as he looked over at his once friend now boyfriend.

_Damn he’s so attractive._

“You alright there?”

“Yeah, I’m great.” Remus grinned.

“You just making love-y eyes at me.” Sirius laughed.

“I was just thinking that you’re rather attractive.”

“Why thank you.” Sirius smiled, “You’re not so bad yourself.”

“Guys we can hear you.” James turned to them.

“Yeah, get used to it.” Sirius laughed and quickly pressed a kiss to Remus’ jaw.

They walked the rest of the way to the school building and up to the Gryffindor common room and up to their dorm room. 

“Truth or dare?” James asked and they nodded and all took seats on the floor. 

Remus loved that when he sat down leant against his bed, Sirius sat down next to him so their sides were pressed together and Remus looped his arm around him to rest on Sirius’ hip. 

“I’m too single to cope with this.” Peter sighed.

“I can get Lily up here if you want,” James laughed, “Make that a bit worse for you.”

Remus’ phone vibrated in his pocket and he pulled it out, reading the text from the notification on his lock screen, “Oh and Rhys and Joe are gonna come up as well.”

“Seriously?” Peter groaned.

“Sirius-ly,” Sirius laughed, reading the text over Remus’ shoulder.

“I feel attacked.” 

“We probably can get you a girl if you really want Pete,” James laughed, “I’m sure Lily would set you up with one of her friends or something.”

“Yeah, alright.” 

They spent a few minutes chatting aimlessly about what single girl would be best for Peter before Rhys and Joe knocked on the door and came in. 

Rhys stopped dead almost immediately upon entry and stared at Remus and Sirius. “Is this what I think it is?”

“Yeah I would expect so.” Remus smiled and pulled Sirius impossibly closer to him. 

“That would explain why Will came into the common room looking like a sad little cloud.” Joe frowned and took a seat on the floor. 

“Listen we’ll talk about him later, don’t worry about it.” Rhys hissed as he sat down and the pair held a whispered conversation and Remus watched them, frowning. 

“What’s going on guys?” 

“You ask him.”

“No you ask him.”

“Shut up.”

“Guys what’s going on?” Sirius frowned as they continued to squabble back and forth. 

“Fine,” Rhys hissed to his boyfriend and they both turned back to look at Remus who felt suddenly very afraid. “Remus, we were wondering…” he paused as if figuring out how to ask a particularly awkward question, “if it would be okay for us to ask Will to go out with us?”

Peter spluttered and Sirius laughed at his shock. 

Remus shut his eyes and held back a bit of awkward laughter and smiled, “sure guys, do what you want.”

“How long have you guys been holding onto that for?” Sirius laughed, “The man’s been single all of 5 minutes.”

“We could ask you the same question.” Joe raised his eyebrows.

“Touché.”

“Can we play truth or dare now?” James sighed.

“Yeah alright then.” 

“Okay, Remus truth or dare?”

“Uhhh, truth.”

They played the game as they always did and Remus watched and listened happily as his friends embarrassed themselves. He smiled slowly as Sirius shifted throughout the game to lean on his shoulder and then slid down to rest his head in Remus’ lap as he used to do. Remus happily played with Sirius’ hair and watched him without shame or without worrying about getting caught. Now every time Sirius caught him looking he would give him this beaming smile that made Remus’ insides do a flip, and once he even took Remus’ hand in his and started running his thumb over the back of Remus’ hand. 

Remus couldn’t help but watch his boyfriend and smile, knowing how far he’d come from a month before hand when he had been hiding in the closet, guiltily watching his best friend from afar. 

“You’re adorable when you look at me like that.” Sirius grinned and leant up to kiss Remus.

Remus sighed into Sirius’ mouth.

_God I’m never going to get used to this._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks so much for reading guys!
> 
> Hopefully over the month of December I'll be getting out some christmassy one shots before I start up on my next long haul fic in January. But don't count on it because I'm very busy with school.
> 
> Love you all loads
> 
> ~ i_ship_too_many_things <3


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